BigJimsWornOutTires
Kraken
- Joined
- Feb 6, 2021
- Posts
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Earlier today, this hideous foid was leaving the grocery store smiling and looking at me. Ugh. I couldn't bare to see that face. I felt as if evil was targeting me. As if a monster was among me! And that Monster was stalking its next prey.
She noticed my recoil as her grin, bit by bit, shifted to anger. What a grotesque face, I reminded myself. She rushed to me as if A MONSTER ABOUT TO DEVOUR ME! I quivered again. The creature expressed as she neared me, "You don't have to be a jerk! Gad! Okay, I'm ugly." She stopped a foot from me and continued, "I get that! But don't act like I'm a monster."
"Ugh. The veterinarian's office is across the street. Perhaps, you're in the wrong place?" I offered advice.
"Oh, wonderful. Seeing that I don't have a dog ... I'm that dog," shaking her head to a moment of clarity.
"Just saying. Not gonna lie." Walking away, though, I kept glancing back cautiously as I reached my Soul. She followed. My gad, the Monster, is hunting me. "BE GONE, MONSTER!" I yelled with my hands out, defending myself.
"What a jerk! My car is right there." Pointing to a Porsche adjacent to my Soul, she becomes gloomy. "I didn't ask for any of this!" She hurried to it but dropped her keys. "Why!" She yelped, leaned, retrieved them, and rattled them about, trying to find the correct one. She attempts to insert a key, but they drop again. "I hate this fucking world!" She leans again and plucks them off the filthy pavement. She scrambles the keys and inserts one. Success. She opened the door and scurried inside.
"Phew." I was fortunate this time. Why did they have to lift the mask mandate? Shaking my head. And during that juncture, she stayed stationed. She started her engine but didn't move. She stared ahead as if in an NPC hex. Suddenly, a fast-food balding manlet fan comes wobbling from the store carrying two plastic bags of garbage food, the latter, I assume. Ugh. His XXX-extra large shirt caught my attention. The decal I knew all too well. Reddit. He wobbles to the Munster vehicle, walks to the passenger side, andclimbs, squeezes inside. They have a conversation as both creatures skim me simultaneously. But the manlet catches I'm examining him and swiftly pivots off Redditily. But she persists, staring with hatred.
I slide inside my vehicle, start that bitch up, and drive off into the beautiful sunset.
Now for the happy ending.
That was fiction. And that is what those Reddit retards, and dumb-witted Dollar Tree foids do on that network — write fantasy garbage and claim it's nonfiction to provoke sympathy because they're smug and hideous inside. Miserable, lazy fucks as well.
Regardless of how your face and body compare to models and Instagram whores, if you accept yourself as ugly because of your spoiled, pampered upbringing and retaliate deceptively provoking anger in others, you're now that projection. You're now delicious fodder for Chads and Stacies.
You lost.
This has been a free-of-charge Monster Energy Drink ad placement unapproved by the company, but if they don't like it, they can lick my smooth ballsack for not running another tab promotion, "Fuck you, Monster! And fuck you and these 30,000 tabs sitting in buckets collecting dust."
She noticed my recoil as her grin, bit by bit, shifted to anger. What a grotesque face, I reminded myself. She rushed to me as if A MONSTER ABOUT TO DEVOUR ME! I quivered again. The creature expressed as she neared me, "You don't have to be a jerk! Gad! Okay, I'm ugly." She stopped a foot from me and continued, "I get that! But don't act like I'm a monster."
"Ugh. The veterinarian's office is across the street. Perhaps, you're in the wrong place?" I offered advice.
"Oh, wonderful. Seeing that I don't have a dog ... I'm that dog," shaking her head to a moment of clarity.
"Just saying. Not gonna lie." Walking away, though, I kept glancing back cautiously as I reached my Soul. She followed. My gad, the Monster, is hunting me. "BE GONE, MONSTER!" I yelled with my hands out, defending myself.
"What a jerk! My car is right there." Pointing to a Porsche adjacent to my Soul, she becomes gloomy. "I didn't ask for any of this!" She hurried to it but dropped her keys. "Why!" She yelped, leaned, retrieved them, and rattled them about, trying to find the correct one. She attempts to insert a key, but they drop again. "I hate this fucking world!" She leans again and plucks them off the filthy pavement. She scrambles the keys and inserts one. Success. She opened the door and scurried inside.
"Phew." I was fortunate this time. Why did they have to lift the mask mandate? Shaking my head. And during that juncture, she stayed stationed. She started her engine but didn't move. She stared ahead as if in an NPC hex. Suddenly, a fast-food balding manlet fan comes wobbling from the store carrying two plastic bags of garbage food, the latter, I assume. Ugh. His XXX-extra large shirt caught my attention. The decal I knew all too well. Reddit. He wobbles to the Munster vehicle, walks to the passenger side, and
I slide inside my vehicle, start that bitch up, and drive off into the beautiful sunset.
Now for the happy ending.
That was fiction. And that is what those Reddit retards, and dumb-witted Dollar Tree foids do on that network — write fantasy garbage and claim it's nonfiction to provoke sympathy because they're smug and hideous inside. Miserable, lazy fucks as well.
Regardless of how your face and body compare to models and Instagram whores, if you accept yourself as ugly because of your spoiled, pampered upbringing and retaliate deceptively provoking anger in others, you're now that projection. You're now delicious fodder for Chads and Stacies.
You lost.
This has been a free-of-charge Monster Energy Drink ad placement unapproved by the company, but if they don't like it, they can lick my smooth ballsack for not running another tab promotion, "Fuck you, Monster! And fuck you and these 30,000 tabs sitting in buckets collecting dust."
Perhaps, one day, unattractive people, thus Reddit users will be permanently quarantined in Chinese ugly camps for the safety of the community. One day. 
