Fear
Anatomy is Destiny
- Joined
- Oct 13, 2019
- Posts
- 722
- Reputation
- 3,144
Over the span of 15 years, at considerable financial, physical, and psychological cost, I have undertaken the following:
Even so, that's a trade I was willing to make... for myself.
But what of my children?
Whether you're old enough to feel it yet or not, having children is what all looksmaxxing is eventually meant to enable. But I am horrified to ponder how mine will require so much — so much — just to not live a life of rot and darkness. Surgery after surgery, drugs, rigid structure. Correct diet, correct hobbies, correct posture. A lifetime of essentially defying what's in their very bones. And that's just the best case scenario.
What's for certain is that by merely being born, they'll start out in the world already at a loss. They'll waste the first quarter or even third of their life playing catch-up, struggling desperately against genes that deserved to die out, just for a hope at being loved and accepted. And in the decades of lost time and missed experiences, a resentment will begin to bloom in their heart, and the same realization will darken their outlook as it once did mine: life is cruelly, absurdly, and supremely unfair.
In short, to harvest the ultimate fruit of my efforts will mean to perpetuate a chain of misery.
So should people like us have children? In good conscience, can we?
This is my dilemma, and when I smile and laugh as the woman I love imagines our future children aloud, one horrible truth haunts me:
I'll be the author of all their pain.
And they'll pay the price for all my cheating.
- Otoplasty to correct protruding ears.
- An isotretinoin regimen to treat recalcitrant facial and body acne.
- 4 years of braces as a teenager that left me with an underbite.
- LeFort I to advance my stunted maxilla, lift my drooping nose, and correct my underbite.
- BSSO to reduce my overgrown mandible, shorten my face, and correct my underbite.
- Another 18 months of braces post-jaw surgery, as an adult.
- Septoplasty made necessary by maxillary rotation.
- Rhinoplasty to reshape my bulbous nose.
- Buccal fat removal to give my face much-needed angularity.
- A 6 millimeter lip lift so my teeth show when I smile or just speak.
- Periorbital fat transfer to treat dark circles and sunken eyes since childhood.
- Forehead reduction to lower my hairline.
- An inconvenient cocktail of obscure chemicals to preserve my hairline.
Even so, that's a trade I was willing to make... for myself.
But what of my children?
Whether you're old enough to feel it yet or not, having children is what all looksmaxxing is eventually meant to enable. But I am horrified to ponder how mine will require so much — so much — just to not live a life of rot and darkness. Surgery after surgery, drugs, rigid structure. Correct diet, correct hobbies, correct posture. A lifetime of essentially defying what's in their very bones. And that's just the best case scenario.
What's for certain is that by merely being born, they'll start out in the world already at a loss. They'll waste the first quarter or even third of their life playing catch-up, struggling desperately against genes that deserved to die out, just for a hope at being loved and accepted. And in the decades of lost time and missed experiences, a resentment will begin to bloom in their heart, and the same realization will darken their outlook as it once did mine: life is cruelly, absurdly, and supremely unfair.
In short, to harvest the ultimate fruit of my efforts will mean to perpetuate a chain of misery.
So should people like us have children? In good conscience, can we?
This is my dilemma, and when I smile and laugh as the woman I love imagines our future children aloud, one horrible truth haunts me:
I'll be the author of all their pain.
And they'll pay the price for all my cheating.
