karbo
300 iq mastermind sociopath manipulator demi-god
- Joined
- Sep 4, 2019
- Posts
- 8,246
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sometimes when im going home by bus, looking out on the window listening to music, i get the urge to cry because i suddenly realize how alone i am really
the only true friend i ever had is not here anymore, and just when i thought i found a person who i can share my deep thoughts with, she leaves me. obviously, with my mental, i couldnt keep her for too long. its funny how she always acted she's broken, meanwhile i was the one that needed to be saved. yet she was the one to leave me
i cope by thinking they are still thinking about me, but reality is that they all found other people and i am left alone once again. it feels terrible to find music, memes, or movies, and not be able to share it with anyone. when you are depressed, there's no one to talk to
it makes me feel so bad that i unconsciously make myself believe im not actually alone, and the people i desire can hear the conversations i have in my head
my everyday life is playing out like a twitch stream in my head, where i pretend various people can see my thoughts and actions
but when i think about the fact that im actually alone, it makes me feel so weird. its beyond my understanding. when im walking on the street having deep thoughts, no one can actually hear it, no one observes me walking, and all of those has nothing to do with anyone, besides me. its unreal for me, i cant process it
this coping mechanism is so strong, my brain prevents me from feeling truly alone. maybe i'd just rope if i didnt have these delusions
i feel like i'll never find a soulmate on this gay earth. and i just make it worse for myself, by creating these unrealistic scenarios in my head, where i live out my fantasies i cant obtain in real life
the only true friend i ever had is not here anymore, and just when i thought i found a person who i can share my deep thoughts with, she leaves me. obviously, with my mental, i couldnt keep her for too long. its funny how she always acted she's broken, meanwhile i was the one that needed to be saved. yet she was the one to leave me
i cope by thinking they are still thinking about me, but reality is that they all found other people and i am left alone once again. it feels terrible to find music, memes, or movies, and not be able to share it with anyone. when you are depressed, there's no one to talk to
it makes me feel so bad that i unconsciously make myself believe im not actually alone, and the people i desire can hear the conversations i have in my head
my everyday life is playing out like a twitch stream in my head, where i pretend various people can see my thoughts and actions
but when i think about the fact that im actually alone, it makes me feel so weird. its beyond my understanding. when im walking on the street having deep thoughts, no one can actually hear it, no one observes me walking, and all of those has nothing to do with anyone, besides me. its unreal for me, i cant process it
this coping mechanism is so strong, my brain prevents me from feeling truly alone. maybe i'd just rope if i didnt have these delusions
i feel like i'll never find a soulmate on this gay earth. and i just make it worse for myself, by creating these unrealistic scenarios in my head, where i live out my fantasies i cant obtain in real life
