ImmortalKenDoll
Bronze
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2024
- Posts
- 406
- Reputation
- 199
lowkey im kind of over looksmaxxing and life in general right now. it feels like everything is a never ending chase that never fully fulfills you. i have been on this forum since like 2021 i started as a scronny recessed subhuman and over the years somehow made my way to getting rated at least high htn by everyone i asked. i got compliments irl on my jaw and my looks and shit and it felt good in the moment but always at the back of my mind the thought comes "if i get taller, if i get more forward growth, will i recieve more love and admiration?" like-
i'm genuinely so over it like for years this shit has gone on
when i discovered blackpill all those years ago i started wageslaving for trimax. i just wanted to look in the mirror and see a face i was proud of. i worked my ass off day and night so i could afford it and finally be free of the burden of being ugly and an outcast. when i had finally saved all the money i needed after 3 years, the surgeon told me i needed to get braces prior to the procedure. i was like FUCKKKK i have to wait even longer to finally live life free and beautiful?? FUCK! anyways i was told i needed to wear braces for 2 years and get extractions before surgery as "decompensation" or whatever. the year goes by and somehow my face completely transforms. i legit went from recessed sunken jaw ltn to chad square robust jaw no larp. i think it was somehow from the bimaxillary protrusion being lessened with the extraction or something i have no idea.
but anyways i pretty much had jaw surgery tier results without even getting the trimax. i finally had a face i liked and was proud of. but even then i still had thoughts, "what if i looked better.. this still isnt good enough". then i started to feel insecure about my height which to begin with i genuinely did not give a flying fuck about i just wanted a perfect jaw. suddenly i found myself longing to be large and in charge and be the biggest man in the room. and now at 6'0 im considering LL. since i have all that money saved up for the trimax i never did, i could use it for that.
but i wonder. if after all that effort, if i continue to perfect my physical form in every which way will it actually be enough in the end? will i actually be happy and fulfilled? i genuinely thought life would be heaven after having the face i do now but i just found more things to hyperfixate on. the never enough shit people on here talk about is true. and i see all these posts about people who are already good looking like me but, they want more too. i see fuckin 6'3 guys under heightpill videos and how to grow taller videos saying how they dont feel tall enough? i see htn+ wanting surgery even chadlites on discords and on here too. like is this just the human condition to NEVER feel good enough?
like fucking hell im truly over it i just want to be an omnipotent god unmoggable seraphim that doesnt have to succumb to this bullshit human concept of mog or be mogged.
i'm genuinely so over it like for years this shit has gone on
when i discovered blackpill all those years ago i started wageslaving for trimax. i just wanted to look in the mirror and see a face i was proud of. i worked my ass off day and night so i could afford it and finally be free of the burden of being ugly and an outcast. when i had finally saved all the money i needed after 3 years, the surgeon told me i needed to get braces prior to the procedure. i was like FUCKKKK i have to wait even longer to finally live life free and beautiful?? FUCK! anyways i was told i needed to wear braces for 2 years and get extractions before surgery as "decompensation" or whatever. the year goes by and somehow my face completely transforms. i legit went from recessed sunken jaw ltn to chad square robust jaw no larp. i think it was somehow from the bimaxillary protrusion being lessened with the extraction or something i have no idea.
but anyways i pretty much had jaw surgery tier results without even getting the trimax. i finally had a face i liked and was proud of. but even then i still had thoughts, "what if i looked better.. this still isnt good enough". then i started to feel insecure about my height which to begin with i genuinely did not give a flying fuck about i just wanted a perfect jaw. suddenly i found myself longing to be large and in charge and be the biggest man in the room. and now at 6'0 im considering LL. since i have all that money saved up for the trimax i never did, i could use it for that.
but i wonder. if after all that effort, if i continue to perfect my physical form in every which way will it actually be enough in the end? will i actually be happy and fulfilled? i genuinely thought life would be heaven after having the face i do now but i just found more things to hyperfixate on. the never enough shit people on here talk about is true. and i see all these posts about people who are already good looking like me but, they want more too. i see fuckin 6'3 guys under heightpill videos and how to grow taller videos saying how they dont feel tall enough? i see htn+ wanting surgery even chadlites on discords and on here too. like is this just the human condition to NEVER feel good enough?
like fucking hell im truly over it i just want to be an omnipotent god unmoggable seraphim that doesnt have to succumb to this bullshit human concept of mog or be mogged.
