SpectrumAesthetics3
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- Dec 30, 2025
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Here's @SpectrumAesthetics3 1yr ago today.
Wanted to be shredded then as badly as ever, but it was a 3-yr roller coaster with various gradations of bloatedness
What a disaster
What a complete waste of time at uni
What a complete downer knowing you are unlovable to girls without the power to change it despite your best intentions or efforts
To go out on campus or in town knowing that making great serendipitous memories only happens if you are worthy, to feel the nihilist reality of existence when unattractive
The above was with bonesmashing swelling too, so would have been even worse and less defined without that
Was hell on earth before I found new life in GLPs, which finally made it physiologically and psychologically possible to get leaner than ever before and to keep it
And this is why I’m often not bothering myself with getting out in the world rn while still in the HTN-range, waiting until true full chadlite. Absolute extreme looks outlier or just forget it. Since I come from a background where there was IMO zero benefit to existing in the world, where the “benefits” of walking around campus were just being invisible and unimportant and knowing I wasn’t a fraction of the person I wanted to be and yet wanting so badly to ascend.
So, there’s the needed help that GLPs provided and then that MAOI treatment does as well for my poor baseline neurochemistry, which also helps (this is a more recent thing I started though).
But then there’s still challenges, there’s waking up in the middle of the night despite sleeping pill use that reduces cognition and energy the next day without fully solving sleep on prolonged PSMF, and then there’s those hunger periods that hit hard sometimes.
But id rather starve through it all since any heaven on earth life quality that you can experience as a guy is predicated on having starved enough to become extreme-outlier chiseled and then maintain it forever.
So now that I have the tools to mentally and physically enable leanness, even though the process is still not exactly a picnic in the park on a nice sunny day, I am willing to suffer whatever it fucking takes to redeem the lost years, failed use of uni years, the longest periods of not meeting the job qualifications for the role of dating pretty girls.
So I’m going to use every anti-aging thing conceivable to preserve a young look and then every softmaxx and hardmaxx and fraud to become the most I can possibly be in the present. Since I’ve experienced non-existence, I’ve been the sad fuck in the first picture, and I will ruthlessly do anything it takes to get absolutely as far away from that as possible and to redeem myself.
All of this is why I can’t relate to anyone not on a sub-1000cal PSMF diet until they become Jordan Barrett. I think some people just don’t cognize how much better things could be
If you are not dying to ascend, if you would not give anything to look like the bottom pics and ideally better vs the top pic, then you are LDARing, and tremendous ascension isn’t possible for you. Since this whole business of PSMF to get more carved instead of a complacent pretty lean or even less, and then maintenance of ur Barrett face thereafter, this business of using the hammer properly 2 and often ideally 3 times per day, and the ordeal of determining what your limitations are that you can’t fix thru other things and then narrowing down your list of hardmaxxes and calling places and setting up consults and saving money and maybe flying overseas for a better value surgery, this isn’t really an “easy” business.
I can only relate w/ those who are as extreme as me ATP. This is the spirit you need to make this stuff work. There’s no other way I could live. I am giving this every fiber of my fucking being and would rather die on the operating table during an elective procedure than die the perpetual death of the "life" I had before
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