How lucky I am and how grateful I should be.

[iamsub3fml]

I realized I’ve been around people that are not really focused on their looks but rather on what they want to do outside. They know they have no control of their facial bones and know about surgery but they don’t really feel like having a materialistic view of themself and would rather would focus on making others happy and some things I view myself as not being able to have such things they have like having the risk to take such things and making it far and having relationships while I stay stuck on myself focusing on my looks. Yet I find it hard to distract myself from looking at the mirror in disgust I could wish for a better life but I know cause of my own actions of feeling distasteful towards others I feel guilty and there are others who wished they had a better looking face or just a normal one and I am here thinking of wanting something that others cannot have and our faces being measured by numbers and our faces having to be certain millimeters just so we can attract others and have necks looking back at you with awe. I wonder if I was better looking but have I ever wondered what it would be like if someone else could experience even having a life which they are not judged so easily. Those who are crying just because they know it’s over I always resent myself cause of my own hatred towards others and humans for treating others less because of looks.

 

[Minnie lacking]

TLDR

he is feeling aware that he knows he isn't in the worst case scenario but he hates that he wants to be a level of looks that are aweing to look at and that everyone will see how attractive he is as a genetic anomaly sent from the heavens, basically became aware of others struggles and he is also in the rat race for perfection whilst he feels horrible for judging so easily ( is that an alright summary for my English class professor )