astatin
520
- Joined
- Dec 10, 2025
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- 2,780
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does anyone else ever snap awake
like really awake not sleepy
i mean every nerve liting up like god shoved your soul back into your body too hard
i can feel my tongue sitting in my mouth right now
my teeth
my heartbeat
my skin touching my clothes in 10000000 different places at once
my eyes blinking
my lungs dragging air in and out
every step feels interesting
like how am i moving
how am i thinking
how is any of this real
people just walk around buying groceries and answering texts like this is normal
like we are not flesh creatures on a spinning rock in endless blackness
how are they not screaming
everyone is laughing at work talking about lunch and traffic and weekend plans
meanwhile i am standing there fully aware i exist
fully aware they exist
billions of separate minds walking around with memories and fears and favorite songs
and somehow we all act okay????
i look at strangers and it hits me that they are real too
they have a life
entire private worlds
and i am just some background figure in theirs
it makes my skin crawl
like am i seeing too much?????

i am a body
i am in it right now
i have hands
i have a face
people can see me
this is happening constantly
no breaks no pause no exit
just endless awareness
sometimes i wish i could go back to not noticing
but now every second feels WEIRD
every sound too QUEIT
every thought echoing forever
i am here
i am here
i am HERE
I AM HERE
HERE
AM I HERE
HERE I AM
I HERE AM
I AM HERE
HERE
SM
I
I
AM
HERE
I
AM
like really awake not sleepy
i mean every nerve liting up like god shoved your soul back into your body too hard
i can feel my tongue sitting in my mouth right now
my teeth
my heartbeat
my skin touching my clothes in 10000000 different places at once
my eyes blinking
my lungs dragging air in and out
every step feels interesting
like how am i moving
how am i thinking
how is any of this real
people just walk around buying groceries and answering texts like this is normal
like we are not flesh creatures on a spinning rock in endless blackness
how are they not screaming
everyone is laughing at work talking about lunch and traffic and weekend plans
meanwhile i am standing there fully aware i exist
fully aware they exist
billions of separate minds walking around with memories and fears and favorite songs
and somehow we all act okay????
i look at strangers and it hits me that they are real too
they have a life
entire private worlds
and i am just some background figure in theirs
it makes my skin crawl
like am i seeing too much?????

i am a body
i am in it right now
i have hands
i have a face
people can see me
this is happening constantly
no breaks no pause no exit
just endless awareness
sometimes i wish i could go back to not noticing
but now every second feels WEIRD
every sound too QUEIT
every thought echoing forever
i am here
i am here
i am HERE
I AM HERE
HERE
AM I HERE
HERE I AM
I HERE AM
I AM HERE
HERE
SM
I
I
AM
HERE
I
AM