BigBallsLarry
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- Jun 8, 2025
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I've been thinking about this a lot lately, aswell as had many people like @TechnoBoss point it out to me.
I don't really have a particular personality. It always mirrors or adjusts based on who i am talking to. I mirror people and i adapt to their behavior. I act in whatever way feels safest at the moment.
I am quieter around people that are confident
I am understanding and patient around people that are sad
I laugh around people that are funny and outgoing
I act small and lenient around people that act dominant.
And it's not because I'm fake or because I'm selfish, it's only because i want to be liked. The uncomfortable truth in this is, that the more you try to be loved, the more personality you lose, and the more of 'yourself' you actually erase.
I am loved by many, but I'm not close to anyone except a select few.
I don't have or share strong opinions unless i know they'll be accepted by everyone.
I never fully disagree with anyone, unless i know what I'm saying is 100% the truth. I avoid conflict like it's the plague, i want no part of it.
I don't want anyone to think 'this larry guy is stupid', because it breaks me and my illusion of self worth.
So after all of this, i end up being no one.
But what i noticed with being 'no one', is that paradoxically, by being no one, you're also everyone.
I can fit anywhere, i can belong in most groups, speak any language, share any hobby. I can be relatable to everyone, but at the same time ignored by everyone.
And when I'm not watched by anyone, when there's no one to mimic or cling to - i am simply a sad excuse of a person. Rotting away, living day by day, with no one to appeal to and no one to compliment my behavior.
It's strange realizing, that being liked by everyone can feel lonelier than being disliked by a few.
Maybe i need to act upon that realization
At some point in life, i need to choose between being liked or being real.
@Daddy's Home @Orka @Jason Voorhees @Insomnia
I don't really have a particular personality. It always mirrors or adjusts based on who i am talking to. I mirror people and i adapt to their behavior. I act in whatever way feels safest at the moment.
I am quieter around people that are confident
I am understanding and patient around people that are sad
I laugh around people that are funny and outgoing
I act small and lenient around people that act dominant.
And it's not because I'm fake or because I'm selfish, it's only because i want to be liked. The uncomfortable truth in this is, that the more you try to be loved, the more personality you lose, and the more of 'yourself' you actually erase.
I am loved by many, but I'm not close to anyone except a select few.
I don't have or share strong opinions unless i know they'll be accepted by everyone.
I never fully disagree with anyone, unless i know what I'm saying is 100% the truth. I avoid conflict like it's the plague, i want no part of it.
I don't want anyone to think 'this larry guy is stupid', because it breaks me and my illusion of self worth.
So after all of this, i end up being no one.
But what i noticed with being 'no one', is that paradoxically, by being no one, you're also everyone.
I can fit anywhere, i can belong in most groups, speak any language, share any hobby. I can be relatable to everyone, but at the same time ignored by everyone.
And when I'm not watched by anyone, when there's no one to mimic or cling to - i am simply a sad excuse of a person. Rotting away, living day by day, with no one to appeal to and no one to compliment my behavior.
It's strange realizing, that being liked by everyone can feel lonelier than being disliked by a few.
Maybe i need to act upon that realization
At some point in life, i need to choose between being liked or being real.
@Daddy's Home @Orka @Jason Voorhees @Insomnia
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