hax
big things coming soon
- Joined
- Jan 1, 2025
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almost died of clod overnight, a near death experience i wasn’t even aware of.
this happened because i overdosed on antipsychotics right before sleeping which made me unable to move or wake up for 15 hours.
15 hours my body was decaying and it couldn’t fight back.
i had extreme thoughts on my way there, some i could not share here.
simply put, i’ve had to stop myself multiple times from breaking into people’s houses.
any sort of thinking pushed me to the edge of jumping off these houses, i had to punch myself to stay focused.
when i came back, my mom didn’t really say much and my dad was being a bitch, laughing at my obsessions.
my mom told him i already ate eggs with milk as soon as i came back. he told me that i didn’t need it unless i worked out, then proceeded to laugh at what we were eating by pointing out the vitamins in them.
he then said the only thing i’ll be lifting is my hammer. they simply will never learn.
luckily, my body is shut off, the teasing did not get to me.
i cannot rage, i cannot cry, i cannot feel any emotion whatsoever; most likely due to antipsychotics.
my tinnitus is louder than ever, i cannot enjoy the simple idea of silence.
my eyes are stuck comically wide open and my vision is blurry, i am unable to focus.
my mind is completely blank and i have lost track of time; i need a complete wipe of my mind and hormones.
so yes, i pussied-out on the surface, but it was for my own good.
@truejamal @valentine @Psocho @afroheadluke
