I just have to accept that I will never have a normal relationship with my family

[LosPollosTV]

I can ascend my looks
I can ascend my status
But I will never have a regular relationship with my family.

For context, I’m the oldest out of the four of us, and I am the worst older brother imaginable.

I’m not a role model.. Im very low iq, ugly, short, and completely isolated myself from all of them growing up.

I would be lying if I could tell you the exact reason as to why, I’m in an ongoing nature vs nurture debate in my head in regards to it.. But if I were to take a guess, it’s probably a combination of high neuroticism caused by social outcasting as a kid and low impulse control causing me to not give a fuck about anything.

I’ve gotten better at managing both of these things, but it seems as if my family has grown up to be so isolated from each other, my siblings can’t even look each other in the eye when they talk amongst themselves.

I can’t help but think this was a trickle down effect from the way I treated them, they all absorbed my behavior as a sponge, my little brother who is easily a HTN and 6’ is a complete mentalcel who I don’t think has had an ounce of pussy yet.

I’m tempted to think this is just the genetic coding of my family, socially isolated and highly neurotic traits, but at the same time I see a bit of NTness amongst all of them.

It’s too late anyways, we will probably never open up to each other at this point.

 

[Deleted member 168392]

Might be genetics. My dad has three siblings. All of em are on antidepressants SSRIs which fuck you up. My dad refused to take but he is definitely slightly autistic and has ocd tendencies, low social skills. I also have mental problems and low social skills but mine are just abused dog mindset, they would go away if I reached true MTN.

 

[Prøphet]

It’s not your fault that’s definitely sounds genetic I have cousins who have neuroticism and high inhib like me when we barely spent time with each other

 

[LosPollosTV]

Might be genetics. My dad has three siblings. All of em are on antidepressants SSRIs which fuck you up. My dad refused to take but he is definitely slightly autistic and has ocd tendencies, low social skills. I also have mental problems and low social skills but mine are just abused dog mindset, they would go away if I reached true MTN.

Yup, but in my case this comes from my moms side.. my dad has the typical niggeroid low inhib mindset immigrants usually have

 

[Prøphet]

Might be genetics. My dad has three siblings. All of em are on antidepressants SSRIs which fuck you up. My dad refused to take but he is definitely slightly autistic and has ocd tendencies, low social skills. I also have mental problems and low social skills but mine are just abused dog mindset, they would go away if I reached true MTN.

Literally me

 

[LosPollosTV]

It’s not your fault that’s definitely sounds genetic I have cousins who have neuroticism and high inhib like me when we barely spent time with each other

Ahhh I wish I could control for genetics like that with a family tree

My moms side seems to be filled with way more problems though like cerebral palsy, schizophrenia, alcoholism, and anxiety.

Very high in neuroticism

 

[Prøphet]

Ahhh I wish I could control for genetics like that with a family tree

My moms side seems to be filled with way more problems though like cerebral palsy, schizophrenia, alcoholism, and anxiety.

Very high in neuroticism

My dads side has the most insane neuroticism ever and anxiety and my moms side has depression, I inherited both and growing up ugly cemented them in who I am as a person