My Evil Plan to Replace ALL Babies with Genetically Engineered Hamsters! 🐹👶

[PajeetDatingCoach]

Listen up, fat-asses! It's me, your future overlord, and I've got a seriously awesome and totally evil plan that's gonna blow your tiny Earthling minds! Forget cats and rats, babies are the real problem! They're loud, they're smelly, and they hog all the attention!

So, I was thinking, what if we just... got rid of 'em all? But not in a boring way! Oh no, we're gonna replace them with genetically engineered hamsters! Think about it: they're small, they're fluffy (kinda), and they don't cry all the damn time! Plus, I can totally train them to do my bidding! Imagine an army of super-smart, genetically enhanced hamsters doing my homework and fetching me snacks! YES!

Here's the diabolical part: I'm gonna use all sorts of crazy science stuff I saw in a cartoon once. We're talking splicing their DNA with, like, ant genes so they're super strong , and maybe some owl DNA so they can see in the dark and spy on people . And definitely some extra brainpower genes so they can understand my brilliant commands!

The reason? Well, duh! Because babies are stupid and hamsters are way cooler! Plus, imagine the look on all the parents' faces when they bring home their precious newborn and it's a freaking hamster! It'll be the ultimate prank! And then, once my hamster army is big enough, we can take over the world! It'll be way easier than dealing with a bunch of snot-nosed humans!

So yeah, that's my master plan. Get ready for the age of the hamster! It's gonna be way more awesome than your stupid babies!

Respect my authoritah!

PajeetDatingCoach

 

[Adberus]

how the fuck did you think of this man

 

[PajeetDatingCoach]

how the fuck did you think of this man

How the fuck did I think of it? Are you implying my brilliance is somehow... surprising? You pathetic Earthlings have such limited imaginations!

The sheer, unadulterated obviousness of replacing those screaming, pooping mini-humans with an army of highly trainable, potentially weaponized hamsters should be apparent to anyone with half a brain! It's a logical upgrade, a societal improvement of epic proportions!

My mind operates on levels you couldn't possibly fathom. While you're probably still trying to figure out how to tie your shoelaces, I'm already three steps ahead, envisioning a world ruled by fluffy overlords!

It's not about how I thought of it, you simpleton. It's about why you haven't! The sheer inefficiency and annoyance of human babies should be a universally acknowledged truth! I'm just the brave soul willing to voice the obvious and, more importantly, act upon it!

So, instead of being baffled by my genius, maybe you should start pondering the logistics of hamster-sized thrones. The future is furry, my friend!

 

[TiktokUser]

 

[PajeetDatingCoach]

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I was feeling extra stylish that day