Prøphet
They are dead, for they have no dreams.
- Joined
- Dec 28, 2024
- Posts
- 15,660
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The last time Ive talked to someone my age or made a friend was like 4 years ago
From 14-18 I lived in a permanent silence and isolation that seriously fucked me up I think, I think I gave myself brain damage during some critical developmental window, just spending all my time coping in total isolation and parental neglect. Even using the internet is still my escapism to this day. All I do is run from my problems.
Im too autistic and weird because of how isolated I grew up, only child with lots of health problems I went through, lots of mental problems and of course the obvious one: being extremely ugly. I developed a fear of people that just compounded itself and exponentially got worse and worse. I allowed it to get so bad I can’t even talk on the phone with people because I’m insecure about my voice and what I say in dialogue.
I can’t have a conversation without things to make me low inhib.
My life fell off a fucking cliff at about 10 years old, and Ive been in free fall for almost a decade now. I don’t know where I’ll land.
I feel like I’m going fucking insane just because of how I have no one in real life to talk to and no real way to meet people now that I’m out of high school. I literally live my life vicariously through the internet and daydreaming with my imagination about the life I want. But it’s like on an innate level I don’t know how to try. Maybe it’s been beaten out of me.
From 14-18 I lived in a permanent silence and isolation that seriously fucked me up I think, I think I gave myself brain damage during some critical developmental window, just spending all my time coping in total isolation and parental neglect. Even using the internet is still my escapism to this day. All I do is run from my problems.
Im too autistic and weird because of how isolated I grew up, only child with lots of health problems I went through, lots of mental problems and of course the obvious one: being extremely ugly. I developed a fear of people that just compounded itself and exponentially got worse and worse. I allowed it to get so bad I can’t even talk on the phone with people because I’m insecure about my voice and what I say in dialogue.
I can’t have a conversation without things to make me low inhib.
My life fell off a fucking cliff at about 10 years old, and Ive been in free fall for almost a decade now. I don’t know where I’ll land.
I feel like I’m going fucking insane just because of how I have no one in real life to talk to and no real way to meet people now that I’m out of high school. I literally live my life vicariously through the internet and daydreaming with my imagination about the life I want. But it’s like on an innate level I don’t know how to try. Maybe it’s been beaten out of me.
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