My mom told me that she wished I was never born as a child

Xazzy

Xazzy

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This happened when I was 12 my mom and dad got into a massive fight and my mom started yelling at me for some reason about how I have ruined her life because she had me young and could not continue her career as a talk show host or something in entertainment, she went on to tell me how much she hate me for 20min straight and then when I started crying and went into my room she came upto me in my room and acted like the victim saying that this is the first time she has said anything like this to me and that I cause her stress constantly so it cancels out.
I am 16 now and nowdays she trys to smother me in love and show affection any possibility she gets but I know the true form of a person shows when they are enraged so I know deep down she thinks about a life where she did not have me and went onto pursue her career and got famous and rich, how is this my fault I did not tell her to give up her career and give birth to me bitch abortion was an option on the table.

My dad is not much better he used to beat me up a lot as a child cause he is a perfectionist and likes everything to be done a certain way he beat me up a lot growing up due to his anger issues due to this I had a hard time making friends in my old school and as a kid was a loner who got bullied quite a lot and feared going to school everyday this ruined my childhood as I never reported to my parents that my teacher used to beat me up too because I thought I deserved it.

They also constantly mention how much money they are spending on me which makes me feel like a burden on them both of them are narcestic pieces of shit who suddenly want to be affectionate and shit for some reason after tormenting me for years (I do appreciate them for really good genetics), I dont feel like I will ever truly love them I plan on ghosting them when I have a steady income.
 
  • So Sad
Reactions: Jgns
This happened when I was 12 my mom and dad got into a massive fight and my mom started yelling at me for some reason about how I have ruined her life because she had me young and could not continue her career as a talk show host or something in entertainment, she went on to tell me how much she hate me for 20min straight and then when I started crying and went into my room she came upto me in my room and acted like the victim saying that this is the first time she has said anything like this to me and that I cause her stress constantly so it cancels out.
I am 16 now and nowdays she trys to smother me in love and show affection any possibility she gets but I know the true form of a person shows when they are enraged so I know deep down she thinks about a life where she did not have me and went onto pursue her career and got famous and rich, how is this my fault I did not tell her to give up her career and give birth to me bitch abortion was an option on the table.

My dad is not much better he used to beat me up a lot as a child cause he is a perfectionist and likes everything to be done a certain way he beat me up a lot growing up due to his anger issues due to this I had a hard time making friends in my old school and as a kid was a loner who got bullied quite a lot and feared going to school everyday this ruined my childhood as I never reported to my parents that my teacher used to beat me up too because I thought I deserved it.

They also constantly mention how much money they are spending on me which makes me feel like a burden on them both of them are narcestic pieces of shit who suddenly want to be affectionate and shit for some reason after tormenting me for years (I do appreciate them for really good genetics), I dont feel like I will ever truly love them I plan on ghosting them when I have a steady income.
fairs
 
  • +1
Reactions: evilfoidsstrikeagai
To cope with this I did an insane weight loss ascended hard got jacked as fuck but I dont know if it will be truly enough
 
atleast my parents are good people
 
This happened when I was 12 my mom and dad got into a massive fight and my mom started yelling at me for some reason about how I have ruined her life because she had me young and could not continue her career as a talk show host or something in entertainment, she went on to tell me how much she hate me for 20min straight and then when I started crying and went into my room she came upto me in my room and acted like the victim saying that this is the first time she has said anything like this to me and that I cause her stress constantly so it cancels out.
I am 16 now and nowdays she trys to smother me in love and show affection any possibility she gets but I know the true form of a person shows when they are enraged so I know deep down she thinks about a life where she did not have me and went onto pursue her career and got famous and rich, how is this my fault I did not tell her to give up her career and give birth to me bitch abortion was an option on the table.

My dad is not much better he used to beat me up a lot as a child cause he is a perfectionist and likes everything to be done a certain way he beat me up a lot growing up due to his anger issues due to this I had a hard time making friends in my old school and as a kid was a loner who got bullied quite a lot and feared going to school everyday this ruined my childhood as I never reported to my parents that my teacher used to beat me up too because I thought I deserved it.

They also constantly mention how much money they are spending on me which makes me feel like a burden on them both of them are narcestic pieces of shit who suddenly want to be affectionate and shit for some reason after tormenting me for years (I do appreciate them for really good genetics), I dont feel like I will ever truly love them I plan on ghosting them when I have a steady income.
Please if anyone has kids ever on this forum dont be like my parents because of them im borderline suicidal have random panic attacks attachment issues and much more
 
  • So Sad
Reactions: Jgns
same dude I feel u completely, I dont think I can ever truly love my parents anymore tbh all I feel is hate
 
same dude I feel u completely, I dont think I can ever truly love my parents anymore tbh all I feel is hate
I only feel rage when they try to act like they love me the only thing we can do is be their polar opposite
 
  • +1
Reactions: Jgns

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