Rochefort6
Banned
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- Nov 5, 2019
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Day 4, touching your dick = you are a homosexual faggot tbh.
Today I woke up with a clearish head and I didn't feel too tired either; not bursting with energy but not noticeably tired either. I did take a nap throught the day, probably due to rotting a little and eating a bag of shitty crisps
Also was pretty irritable at times with my gf for distracting me from working, not cleaning up the mess I made and not wanted to play ping pong--pretty low t behavior tbh. I feel the masculine energy slowly building up in my body, and its to the point that I don't feel like too much of a low T faggot anymore though, probably around baseline now.
Forgot to supplement with anything today. Tomorrow I will supplement with fish oil and vitamin D3, maybe ashwagandha, with water beside my bed to drink in the morning.
Every time I come across a girl that's cute-ish I contemplate fucking them, not with the savage rapey vibe I feel on higher streaks, more like, I would like this bitch to give me head or some kind of quick release. Obviously these are just compulsive and habitual sexual cravings that are akin to a drug addict trying to get high on anything they can scavenge. Even if I had the option to fuck, it wouldn't be too hard to restrain myself knowing how fucked the feeling of relapse is.
Wasn't close to relapsing at all today.
Had more low inhib moments today, like shouting at a lady that her son looked cool, being very direct with the cashier at a store telling him what I wanted... meh, nothing much to write about, just that the physical anxiety felt on the first 2 days, that ball of stress, is gone. I still can get self-conscious and mentally anxious though.
Took a cold shower just as planned for at least 3 and a half minutes. Didn't really save water like I planned because I like taking a shit with the water running
tomorrow no more wasting water. Anyway, it felt really good after a while (the trick is to stay in untill you're relaxed and the water feels warmer than the ice cold temperature felt when getting in) and I was pretty pumped leaving. It ain't a good shower if you aren't jittering your teeth, sneezing and shaking Talking to my gf and I just kept laughing manically FEELS LIKE A FUCKING DRUG AND YOU KNOW YOUR BOY LIKES GETTING HIGH ASF... naturally and without side effects ☺
Meditated 20mins in the morning easily, and 10 mins at 9 ish--I fucked up there, should have been the afternoon, but I will make it happen tomorrow. I still get very distracted during but that's the point I guess, to refocus your mind after being distracted. Meditation no longer feels like torture I felt noticeably calmer afterward but nothing really significant. From past experiences, If I stuck to 1 hour a day for sure it would be significant, but I want to make this into a habit so I'll stick to 30 mins a day at a scheduled time for 10 days before upping it to 45mins and then 1 hour. Or maybe 30mins a day for 30 days, then 45mins for the next 30 and 1 hour for the last 30.
Again, meditation is key to nofap. My mind is now littered with sexual thoughts, ideas, fantasy, whatever. I'll; imagine porn, previous times I've had sex, and now I am way more regularly thinking about trying to fuck girls I see in public, but not as committed to the idea as I am from when I've been on higher streaks in the past--usually around 2 weeks will I try to take action into fucking other girls, usually ends up being hookers tbh.
TLDR
Today I woke up with a clearish head and I didn't feel too tired either; not bursting with energy but not noticeably tired either. I did take a nap throught the day, probably due to rotting a little and eating a bag of shitty crisps
Also was pretty irritable at times with my gf for distracting me from working, not cleaning up the mess I made and not wanted to play ping pong--pretty low t behavior tbh. I feel the masculine energy slowly building up in my body, and its to the point that I don't feel like too much of a low T faggot anymore though, probably around baseline now.Forgot to supplement with anything today. Tomorrow I will supplement with fish oil and vitamin D3, maybe ashwagandha, with water beside my bed to drink in the morning.
Every time I come across a girl that's cute-ish I contemplate fucking them, not with the savage rapey vibe I feel on higher streaks, more like, I would like this bitch to give me head or some kind of quick release. Obviously these are just compulsive and habitual sexual cravings that are akin to a drug addict trying to get high on anything they can scavenge. Even if I had the option to fuck, it wouldn't be too hard to restrain myself knowing how fucked the feeling of relapse is.
Wasn't close to relapsing at all today.
Had more low inhib moments today, like shouting at a lady that her son looked cool, being very direct with the cashier at a store telling him what I wanted... meh, nothing much to write about, just that the physical anxiety felt on the first 2 days, that ball of stress, is gone. I still can get self-conscious and mentally anxious though.
Took a cold shower just as planned for at least 3 and a half minutes. Didn't really save water like I planned because I like taking a shit with the water running
tomorrow no more wasting water. Anyway, it felt really good after a while (the trick is to stay in untill you're relaxed and the water feels warmer than the ice cold temperature felt when getting in) and I was pretty pumped leaving. It ain't a good shower if you aren't jittering your teeth, sneezing and shaking Talking to my gf and I just kept laughing manically FEELS LIKE A FUCKING DRUG AND YOU KNOW YOUR BOY LIKES GETTING HIGH ASF... naturally and without side effects ☺Meditated 20mins in the morning easily, and 10 mins at 9 ish--I fucked up there, should have been the afternoon, but I will make it happen tomorrow. I still get very distracted during but that's the point I guess, to refocus your mind after being distracted. Meditation no longer feels like torture
I felt noticeably calmer afterward but nothing really significant. From past experiences, If I stuck to 1 hour a day for sure it would be significant, but I want to make this into a habit so I'll stick to 30 mins a day at a scheduled time for 10 days before upping it to 45mins and then 1 hour. Or maybe 30mins a day for 30 days, then 45mins for the next 30 and 1 hour for the last 30. Again, meditation is key to nofap. My mind is now littered with sexual thoughts, ideas, fantasy, whatever. I'll; imagine porn, previous times I've had sex, and now I am way more regularly thinking about trying to fuck girls I see in public, but not as committed to the idea as I am from when I've been on higher streaks in the past--usually around 2 weeks will I try to take action into fucking other girls, usually ends up being hookers tbh.
TLDR
- Woke up with clearish mind and not noticeably tired. Still get irritable. Physical anxiety felt on the first 2 days is gone, can still feel self-conscious. Thinking about fucking other girls, but is simply my mind craving release, it doesn't feel like real strong sexual desire.
- Cold shower produced noticeable effects in me being pumped and laughing a lot after only after showering for an extra minute (3 and a half in total). Won't waste water anymore by turning the shower on only when I get in.
- Fucked up by meditating late again. 20mins in the morning and 10 at 14:00 from now on. Easier in the morning. It doesn't feel like torture anymore. Mind litter with more sexual thoughts. Get distracted very easily. The results aren't super significant afterward as it is for 1 hour per day but will only increase time per day when I comfortably solidify this habit.
