
bombmyhousejfl
Iron
- Joined
- Jun 14, 2025
- Posts
- 233
- Reputation
- 386
i was very suicidal 3 months ago but it didn’t improve at all. I coped a lil here and there but i just can’t live anymore. The reason is my ipd. It’s actually very serious. So many people online kept telling me i look like a fish and all my illusions were broken. I was improving till 2 hours ago, when a girl told me they look extra far apart. I was using a flash filter, but i just couldn’t keep going after that. I had flashbacks of all the hate i’ve received for that and it’s genuinely very, very painful. I’m just a fucking failed experiment, can’t look at myself in the mirror anymore, it’s so tiring. Looks matter so much it’s not even funny. People will keep telling you they don’t just because they dont wanna seem shallow. 99% of people think they look good while they’re either average or subhuman. Most people cope in this world and it’s a known fact, since religion exists. And once you strip away all the cope and u face reality that’s when u face suicide.
I also have very low dopamine in general, i’m rarely fucking happy, and every time i see my fucking face in the mirror my dopamine levels drop even more. I genuinely don’t know what to do. The only way would be to lock myself in a bunker without mirrors, cameras or anyone to see and just stay away from society.
It’s very sad that i’m also still in school feeling this way. Others are just having fun while i’m here thinking about how to die. The only thing stopping me is my family. I just can’t leave them, id ruin their life by solving mine.
I also have very low dopamine in general, i’m rarely fucking happy, and every time i see my fucking face in the mirror my dopamine levels drop even more. I genuinely don’t know what to do. The only way would be to lock myself in a bunker without mirrors, cameras or anyone to see and just stay away from society.
It’s very sad that i’m also still in school feeling this way. Others are just having fun while i’m here thinking about how to die. The only thing stopping me is my family. I just can’t leave them, id ruin their life by solving mine.