GonorrhoeaGobbler
Follow my footsteps — our paths shall never cross.
- Joined
- Nov 11, 2025
- Posts
- 12,134
- Reputation
- 20,978
I'm typing this with one hand while the other clutches my severed finger-the Zetas just delivered it to my doorstep as a "warning" for posting anti-cartel memes. My cousin was beheaded on Facebook Live last week for sharing a meme about El Chapo's receding hairline.
The VPN I'm using is smuggled from Guatemala-I paid for it with my little brothers virginity to a narco lieutenant. Every 10 minutes, I hear AK-47 fire outside as they hunt down anyone who dares log in to foreign sites.
My laptop is covered in bloodstains from when they shot up my house last night-I barely escaped by crawling through the sewer. This forum is literally the only place left where I can scream before they dissolve me in acid or feed me to their attack dogs.
Grant me VIP so at least my corpse has some dignity when they find me floating in the Rio Grande tomorrow morning.
The VPN I'm using is smuggled from Guatemala-I paid for it with my little brothers virginity to a narco lieutenant. Every 10 minutes, I hear AK-47 fire outside as they hunt down anyone who dares log in to foreign sites.
My laptop is covered in bloodstains from when they shot up my house last night-I barely escaped by crawling through the sewer. This forum is literally the only place left where I can scream before they dissolve me in acid or feed me to their attack dogs.
Grant me VIP so at least my corpse has some dignity when they find me floating in the Rio Grande tomorrow morning.