Andros
Kraken
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Catherine Gray, the author of The Unexpected Joy of Being Single, gave up sex for a year in 2014. “Between the ages of 16 and 34, I hadn’t spent more than a few months single,” she says. “I felt incomplete without a plus-one and constantly hunted approval. I reached rock-bottom after being disproportionately crushed by the failure of a six-month relationship, so I decided to give up sex and dating for an entire year.”
The comedian Eleanor Conway used to tell people that her three vices were drink, drugs and men. “I’ve always had an addictive personality,” she says. In 2014, she gave up the first two vices – “and my alcoholic behaviour transferred to Tinder. It’s so easy for a straight woman to date and find casual sex. It’s really fun, if you’re emotionally in the right place.” (It’s also great material if you are a comedian; it inspired her show You May Recognise Me from Tinder.) Over time, however, the “admin” of looking for matches became too much. “The dates became a drag and any sex I had as a result was rubbish. The more sober I got, the more difficult it was to engage in casual dating. It was like my superpower stopped working.”
In 2018, she tried celibacy for 10 months. “Surprisingly, it was a massive relief. I stopped seeing men as sex objects and females as competition.” Conway found her platonic relationships with men and women improved and she was able to focus on her career. She is open to a sexual relationship now, but she knows it will happen only if she has a true connection with a person.
www.theguardian.com
The comedian Eleanor Conway used to tell people that her three vices were drink, drugs and men. “I’ve always had an addictive personality,” she says. In 2014, she gave up the first two vices – “and my alcoholic behaviour transferred to Tinder. It’s so easy for a straight woman to date and find casual sex. It’s really fun, if you’re emotionally in the right place.” (It’s also great material if you are a comedian; it inspired her show You May Recognise Me from Tinder.) Over time, however, the “admin” of looking for matches became too much. “The dates became a drag and any sex I had as a result was rubbish. The more sober I got, the more difficult it was to engage in casual dating. It was like my superpower stopped working.”
In 2018, she tried celibacy for 10 months. “Surprisingly, it was a massive relief. I stopped seeing men as sex objects and females as competition.” Conway found her platonic relationships with men and women improved and she was able to focus on her career. She is open to a sexual relationship now, but she knows it will happen only if she has a true connection with a person.
The power of celibacy: ‘Giving up sex was a massive relief’
The plethora of dating apps has bolstered society’s obsession with sex, but many people find that a period of abstinence makes them happier and healthier
