kdev
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like confidence is too broad of a word to actually be useful here. u can be confident in ur work, ur abilities, ur opinions and still struggle with eye contact. they dont always correlate the way people assume. i think what eye contact actually requires is a specific feeling that ur presence in a situation is legitimate. that u belong in the interaction and ur not intruding on the other persons space by looking at them directly
a lot of guys never developed that feeling because their early social experiences basically taught them the opposite. that their presence was tolerated at best and an inconvenience at worst so the eye contact issue isnt really about confidence its about whether u fundamentally feel like u have the right to be seen and the reason looksmaxxing sometimes fixes it without the guy ever consciously working on it is because improving ur appearance changes that underlying feeling without u having to address it directly. ur brain just quietly updates its assessment of whether u belong in the interaction
which also means some guys can looksmax significantly and still struggle with it because the appearance changed but the underlying feeling never got updated which is crazy to think about lol
a lot of guys never developed that feeling because their early social experiences basically taught them the opposite. that their presence was tolerated at best and an inconvenience at worst so the eye contact issue isnt really about confidence its about whether u fundamentally feel like u have the right to be seen and the reason looksmaxxing sometimes fixes it without the guy ever consciously working on it is because improving ur appearance changes that underlying feeling without u having to address it directly. ur brain just quietly updates its assessment of whether u belong in the interaction
which also means some guys can looksmax significantly and still struggle with it because the appearance changed but the underlying feeling never got updated which is crazy to think about lol
