Stuttercel
Officially Diagnosed Stuttering disability.
- Joined
- Sep 22, 2024
- Posts
- 171
- Reputation
- 157
As a guy with a stutter you can imagine how non-existant my social life is irl. I literally avoid speaking as much as possible because of the stutter. It is such an obvious flaw and disability to sound like a fucking retard everytime you speak. I have something called speech blocks. Which is basically everytime YES everytime i try to speak my speech organs go off course and basically just lock up. Making me physically unable to say what i want. This of course leads me to just not even attempt to talk at my highschool. It's like asking to be bullied, and honestly since i don't talk I've never been bullied about it. Infact i bully myself lol. Ever since i was like 12 I've been calling myself names and shit cuz of my stutter. I've stopped only recently because thinking about it at school while im completely alone is too painful. I am so embarrassed from my stutter that I've put myself in a inescapable paradox of logic.
I want friends, but i refuse to talk to people which makes me depressed because i have no friends. I would go into more detail but ill do that another time. Also before you ask yea i do speech therapy. In fact im 7 years in, but nothing works when you can't control your speech organs.
As you can probably see my only cope would be these types of forums and discord. But unfortunately i suspect im Non-NT (not neurotypical). Because i literally for the life of me can't make any discord friends. Im way too clingy if anyone shows any interest in me because you know im literally attention starved irl and i live a life of almost complete social isolation. So when i talk to people on discord i get crazy and i begin to have literal anxiety attacks because im not sure what to say to people. Like I've literally cried before because i wasn't sure how to start a conversation with someone on discord. Im not sure what is wrong with me but no neurotypical person overthinks that hard when socializing lol. So i resort to jestermaxxing and ragebaiting which really doesn't do much and just reminds me of how lonely i am.
No matter what i do both online and irl i will probably never have a friend group.
And im only in highschool with this type of situation
It's over, game over. I will probably rope within the next 5 years. I can't take this level of social isolation.
Sorry for shitty grammar and spelling im American.
For DNRcels tldr: stuttering and (suspected not confirmed) neurodivergance = complete loneliness.
I want friends, but i refuse to talk to people which makes me depressed because i have no friends. I would go into more detail but ill do that another time. Also before you ask yea i do speech therapy. In fact im 7 years in, but nothing works when you can't control your speech organs.
As you can probably see my only cope would be these types of forums and discord. But unfortunately i suspect im Non-NT (not neurotypical). Because i literally for the life of me can't make any discord friends. Im way too clingy if anyone shows any interest in me because you know im literally attention starved irl and i live a life of almost complete social isolation. So when i talk to people on discord i get crazy and i begin to have literal anxiety attacks because im not sure what to say to people. Like I've literally cried before because i wasn't sure how to start a conversation with someone on discord. Im not sure what is wrong with me but no neurotypical person overthinks that hard when socializing lol. So i resort to jestermaxxing and ragebaiting which really doesn't do much and just reminds me of how lonely i am.
No matter what i do both online and irl i will probably never have a friend group.
And im only in highschool with this type of situation
It's over, game over. I will probably rope within the next 5 years. I can't take this level of social isolation.
Sorry for shitty grammar and spelling im American.
For DNRcels tldr: stuttering and (suspected not confirmed) neurodivergance = complete loneliness.
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im here for you bhai
