Copium Gigathread

thecel

thecel

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Copium is the most popular drug in the world.



Common Types

Pills are the most common form of DIRECT DELIVERY of the drug copium. Copium pills are typically blue in color:

1669266121272


Inhalants are the second most common form of Copium:

1669265652311




Airborne Copium

One may think that they can’t be exposed to any copium as long as they don’t take bluepills or inhale copium. But the truth is, everyone is always inhaling copium. You see, humans who’re on copium exhale it into the air. This is similar to how alcohol is exhaled in breath. Since copium addiction is so widespread, the concentration of copium in Earth’s atmosphere is at a dangerously high level. Almost everyone is inhaling a constant supply of secondhand-copium (it’s like secondhand-smoke except it’s literally everywhere).

The government doesn’t want people to know about this, so they created the red herring of rising atmospheric CO2 PPM. If we’re all obsessing about muh 400 PPM CO2 climate catastrophe, no one would suspect that the real compound on the rise is fucking copium, a highly addictive drug contaminating the global air.




History

Prehistoric humans discovered naturally-occurring copium long before language developed. Copium and copium vapor occur in the natural environment:

THEY INHALE THE COPIUM FROM ITS SOURCE
1668773247028

According to historians, the first person to mix the substance into consumable food was a woman.



Chemistry

In modern times, copium addiction rates are through the roof, higher than they’ve ever been in history. Why? Because the government puts fluoride in the water supply. Copium’s active ingredient is copium estrofluoride. Copium estroflouride readily binds to fluoride molecules in the body, allowing copium to remain active inside the body. Fluoride in the water supply fills NPCs’ bodies with fluoride, which makes them super susceptible to fall victim to copium addictions.

And yes, as its name implies, copium estrofluoride has estrogen in it.




Copium Antagonists

1669267621203


There are copium antagonists. Red pills and black pills are the two main copium antagonists. Known to have terribly unpleasant tastes, these are extremely difficult for most people to swallow. Worse, most people’s bodies are intolerant (like lactose-intolerant) to these kinds of pills. When a person has copium-antagonist intolerance, enzymes in his/her body react so fast to break down copium antagonists that copium antagonists never get to reach his/her brain.

You know what increases copium-antagonist-intolerance? Copium itself. Especially the blue pill kind. Yep, consuming copium can render drugs that stop copium utterly useless.




Blue Pills Painted Red

Red pill and black pill copium antagonists are very expensive, so drug dealers scam people by coating blue copium pills with red food coloring and selling them for cheap. Their buyers—many of whom seek to cure their copium addictions—think they get red pills, but they just overdose on blue pills.



 
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200.gif
 
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:feelswhy: This thread is supposed to be funny like my theory post about the origin of Mongoloid flatxillas:


Either the forum lost its sense of humor or my post quality went to shit:

 
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:feelswhy: This thread is supposed to be funny like my theory post about the origin of Mongoloid flatxillas:


Either the forum lost its sense of humor or my post quality went to shit:

 
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@Xangsane @8PSLcel @Niko @enchanted_elixir @maherstaint
 
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Copium is the most popular drug in the world.



Common Types

Pills are the most common form of DIRECT DELIVERY of the drug copium. Copium pills are typically blue in color:

View attachment 1965626

Inhalants are the second most common form of Copium:

View attachment 1965619




Airborne Copium

One may think that they can’t be exposed to any copium as long as they don’t take bluepills or inhale copium. But the truth is, everyone is always inhaling copium. You see, humans who’re on copium exhale it into the air. This is similar to how alcohol is exhaled in breath. Since copium addiction is so widespread, the concentration of copium in Earth’s atmosphere is at a dangerously high level. Almost everyone is inhaling a constant supply of secondhand-copium (it’s like secondhand-smoke except it’s literally everywhere).

The government doesn’t want people to know about this, so they created the red herring of rising atmospheric CO2 PPM. If we’re all obsessing about muh 400 PPM CO2 climate catastrophe, no one would suspect that the real compound on the rise is fucking copium, a highly addictive drug contaminating the global air.




History

Prehistoric humans discovered naturally-occurring copium long before language developed. Copium and copium vapor occur in the natural environment:



According to historians, the first person to mix the substance into consumable food was a woman.




Chemistry

In modern times, copium addiction rates are through the roof, higher than they’ve ever been in history. Why? Because the government puts fluoride in the water supply. Copium’s active ingredient is copium estrofluoride. Copium estroflouride readily binds to fluoride molecules in the body, allowing copium to remain active inside the body. Fluoride in the water supply fills NPCs’ bodies with fluoride, which makes them super susceptible to fall victim to copium addictions.

And yes, as its name implies, copium estrofluoride has estrogen in it.




Copium Antagonists

View attachment 1965640

There are copium antagonists. Red pills and black pills are the two main copium antagonists. Known to have terribly unpleasant tastes, these are extremely difficult for most people to swallow. Worse, most people’s bodies are intolerant (like lactose-intolerant) to these kinds of pills. When a person has copium-antagonist intolerance, enzymes in his/her body react so fast to break down copium antagonists that copium antagonists never get to reach his/her brain.

You know what increases copium-antagonist-intolerance? Copium itself. Especially the blue pill kind. Yep, consuming copium can render drugs that stop copium utterly useless.




Blue Pills Painted Red

Red pill and black pill copium antagonists are very expensive, so drug dealers scam people by coating blue copium pills with red food coloring and selling them for cheap. Their buyers—many of whom seek to cure their copium addictions—think they get red pills, but they just overdose on blue pills.




What the government doesn't want you to know is that the redpill is an alternate form of copium that is more ancient than the blue kind.
It was used to make men believe that all they needed to do is amass wealth and being confident. The more delusional the average man was about this truth, the better it was for the king and their aristocracy.

As democracy got on, they needed to change the traditional copium. It then turned into the bluepill.
 
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COPIUM 101
 
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Ok
 
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High quality shitpost
 
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