gayincel_foidkiller
Iron
- Joined
- Jul 20, 2026
- Posts
- 6
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idk how what im asking for but i gotta vent, i was with this girl 2 years ago for about 7 months , not a crazy amount of time but she was the first girl i was in love with, being with her was the happeist ive ever been in my 17 years of living, after 7 months she ghosted me and didnt tell me why, at this point i figured i wasnt moving foward with our relationship much, ive been told by doctors and family that im “on the spectrum” because i struggle to understand info like how others do, and when certain times came for us to be more intimate i would just let everything go over my head and keep trying to be funny and wtv. After she ghosted me i was freaking out constantly texting her and crying to myself, this went on for about 6 months, which was when i found this stupid looksmaxxing shit, i didnt read a whole ton about it but i had this little thought in my mind that if i looked good enough shed see me at school and want me back again, a year after our breakup i met another girl and got with her thinking it would distract me from my ex, at the beginning i still cryed, missed my ex and stared at photos of people who “look good” , my new girlfriend thought and still thinks im over her and doesnt know about how i feel and what i do, despite the huge swelling face she sees when i go see her, for the past 6 months ive been consistently bonesmashing and i have cut my medial canthuses and the corners of my lips, no one has noticed, my drug addiction has stopped a lot more recently and i feel that same pain from my ex, i text her but i cant bring myself to talk to her in person, ive been in love with 2 girls for the past 2/1 years and dont know what to do, i cant bring myself to leave my girlfriend with the thiught of how she would feel, and me being alone, plus i basically live at hers due to my home situatIon, ive felt real suicidal for a while and ive never opened up like this
Does anyone lnow what i should do
Does anyone lnow what i should do