nabiodcels
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- Apr 5, 2025
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For context, I started my first year of uni last August and met this Indian foid through a freshman event. At first I only thought she was kinda cute, but she immediately complimented my cheekbones and guessed I was Ethiopian which stood out to me. We kept accidentally seeing each other around campus and she’d always initiate convos with me first. Eventually she added me into a friend group chat, started texting me constantly, asking to hangout, etc. Slowly I caught feelings hard.
One night we were playing cards alone and I realized I couldn’t even focus because I was staring at her face/body the whole time. From then on I basically said yes to every invite she gave me. We got extremely close emotionally and physically over time. She’d constantly ask me to sit next to her, rest her legs on mine, interlock feet with me while we played games, hug me for warmth, have deep late-night convos, etc. Everyone in the friend group eventually realized I liked her.
When she officially found out, she gave me the classic “I’m not ready for a relationship” speech. I handled it awkwardly because I’m high inhib/possibly nd and after that things got distant for a while. But she still kept flirting and acting affectionate randomly. Around her birthday in December she suddenly got super touchy again, cuddling into my jacket, linking arms with me, acting couple-ish, etc.
One moment still haunts me. We were laying on a bed together in a friend’s dorm and she kept scooting closer and closer to me while sober. My friends later said she was obviously trying to cuddle me but instead of escalating I froze up and awkwardly watched TikToks because I was nervous. Eventually she left to go “hangout” with some facially lltn/mltn Mexican dude instead and my friends still roast me for fumbling that.
A few days later we both got drunk at a friend’s apartment and made out multiple times. It was my first makeout ever and I was terrible at it. She was clearly experienced and I could tell she noticed how awkward/self-conscious I was. Afterward she apologized, called herself a hoe, said I deserved better, then also said she could “teach me.” Ever since then I’ve wanted a redo but it never happened.
Over Christmas break she kept replying to my stories with flirty texts/voice notes from Dubai. Then second semester she started acting touchy again: sitting on my lap at parties, laying on my shoulder in cars, sharing food/drinks with me, putting her thighs/legs on me, taking very couple-looking pics together, etc. At the same time though she was also entertaining/talking to other dudes which made me insanely jealous and honestly destroyed my mental health.
Spring break especially messed me up because she stayed on campus while I went on a trip with friends. I still regret not staying because it felt like the perfect chance for us to finally cuddle/makeout/do more while everyone else was gone. Instead I spent the whole trip obsessing over her.
The closer move-out got, the more emotional everything became. During finals week she invited me alone to pregame in her dorm, we sat on each other’s laps, touched each other playfully, and she kept leaning on me drunk again. But even then I still couldn’t initiate another kiss because I was scared of making things weird/getting rejected.
On move-out day we spent hours together talking/eating/helping each other pack. Before leaving I hugged her tightly and told her I loved her and was gonna miss her. She smiled, said it back, and closed the door doing this goofy face she always did with me. After leaving I genuinely felt devastated because freshman year was over and I never got the redo/relationship/FWB situation I wanted.
Now I feel stuck. Part of me thinks she genuinely liked me at some points while another part of me feels like I got emotionally leashmaxxed while she mostly saw me as a safe emotional orbiter/homeboy while entertaining other dudes sexually. She even made a huge public collage story about me saying she’d miss me and a lot of the pics genuinely look like couple pics.
The problem is I still think about her constantly. I get jealous hearing about other dudes, regret not escalating when I had opportunities, and don’t know if staying friends with her is even healthy for me mentally anymore. But at the same time cutting her off would also mean distancing myself from most of the friend group too. She also constantly sends me reels referring to me “homeboy”, “guy best friend” or calls me twin sometimes in real life. Makes me wanna rope even more.
I genuinely don’t know what to do. Was I just too high inhib/nt awkward and fumbled? Was she just using and manipulating me for attention/validation? Should I distance myself completely? I feel like I wasted most of freshman year obsessing over this foid and now summer started and I can’t stop replaying every missed opportunity in my head. Should I attempt to ascend to htn with tattoos, leanmaxx, potentially peptides, and other small soft maxes? I recently talked to a Walmart and will potentially be getting hired, this summer and be more bold when I come back? She keeps sending me reels like that the past few days during the break and it genuinely makes me wanna rope even more. Im already planning my summer ascension plan and starting it. The
Worst part is, this is all happening while we are inside of a friend group group chat, which indirectly involves others snd their opinions, haunting my nd high inhib brain, 5’11 brain. She has even said before that the reasons she wouldn’t date me was because I’m not bold enough and th fact that if we dated and broke up, it would “ruin the friendship” like the friendship was already tainted the moment I caught feelings and we made out, foid logic
TLDR: how do I get over, cut off, or make a move on a girl I’ve been crushing on since September who has basically lead me done stuff with me and still tries to act platonic while teasing me and breadcruming constantly, also still acting flirty and touchy when drunk.
One night we were playing cards alone and I realized I couldn’t even focus because I was staring at her face/body the whole time. From then on I basically said yes to every invite she gave me. We got extremely close emotionally and physically over time. She’d constantly ask me to sit next to her, rest her legs on mine, interlock feet with me while we played games, hug me for warmth, have deep late-night convos, etc. Everyone in the friend group eventually realized I liked her.
When she officially found out, she gave me the classic “I’m not ready for a relationship” speech. I handled it awkwardly because I’m high inhib/possibly nd and after that things got distant for a while. But she still kept flirting and acting affectionate randomly. Around her birthday in December she suddenly got super touchy again, cuddling into my jacket, linking arms with me, acting couple-ish, etc.
One moment still haunts me. We were laying on a bed together in a friend’s dorm and she kept scooting closer and closer to me while sober. My friends later said she was obviously trying to cuddle me but instead of escalating I froze up and awkwardly watched TikToks because I was nervous. Eventually she left to go “hangout” with some facially lltn/mltn Mexican dude instead and my friends still roast me for fumbling that.
A few days later we both got drunk at a friend’s apartment and made out multiple times. It was my first makeout ever and I was terrible at it. She was clearly experienced and I could tell she noticed how awkward/self-conscious I was. Afterward she apologized, called herself a hoe, said I deserved better, then also said she could “teach me.” Ever since then I’ve wanted a redo but it never happened.
Over Christmas break she kept replying to my stories with flirty texts/voice notes from Dubai. Then second semester she started acting touchy again: sitting on my lap at parties, laying on my shoulder in cars, sharing food/drinks with me, putting her thighs/legs on me, taking very couple-looking pics together, etc. At the same time though she was also entertaining/talking to other dudes which made me insanely jealous and honestly destroyed my mental health.
Spring break especially messed me up because she stayed on campus while I went on a trip with friends. I still regret not staying because it felt like the perfect chance for us to finally cuddle/makeout/do more while everyone else was gone. Instead I spent the whole trip obsessing over her.
The closer move-out got, the more emotional everything became. During finals week she invited me alone to pregame in her dorm, we sat on each other’s laps, touched each other playfully, and she kept leaning on me drunk again. But even then I still couldn’t initiate another kiss because I was scared of making things weird/getting rejected.
On move-out day we spent hours together talking/eating/helping each other pack. Before leaving I hugged her tightly and told her I loved her and was gonna miss her. She smiled, said it back, and closed the door doing this goofy face she always did with me. After leaving I genuinely felt devastated because freshman year was over and I never got the redo/relationship/FWB situation I wanted.
Now I feel stuck. Part of me thinks she genuinely liked me at some points while another part of me feels like I got emotionally leashmaxxed while she mostly saw me as a safe emotional orbiter/homeboy while entertaining other dudes sexually. She even made a huge public collage story about me saying she’d miss me and a lot of the pics genuinely look like couple pics.
The problem is I still think about her constantly. I get jealous hearing about other dudes, regret not escalating when I had opportunities, and don’t know if staying friends with her is even healthy for me mentally anymore. But at the same time cutting her off would also mean distancing myself from most of the friend group too. She also constantly sends me reels referring to me “homeboy”, “guy best friend” or calls me twin sometimes in real life. Makes me wanna rope even more.
I genuinely don’t know what to do. Was I just too high inhib/nt awkward and fumbled? Was she just using and manipulating me for attention/validation? Should I distance myself completely? I feel like I wasted most of freshman year obsessing over this foid and now summer started and I can’t stop replaying every missed opportunity in my head. Should I attempt to ascend to htn with tattoos, leanmaxx, potentially peptides, and other small soft maxes? I recently talked to a Walmart and will potentially be getting hired, this summer and be more bold when I come back? She keeps sending me reels like that the past few days during the break and it genuinely makes me wanna rope even more. Im already planning my summer ascension plan and starting it. The
Worst part is, this is all happening while we are inside of a friend group group chat, which indirectly involves others snd their opinions, haunting my nd high inhib brain, 5’11 brain. She has even said before that the reasons she wouldn’t date me was because I’m not bold enough and th fact that if we dated and broke up, it would “ruin the friendship” like the friendship was already tainted the moment I caught feelings and we made out, foid logic
TLDR: how do I get over, cut off, or make a move on a girl I’ve been crushing on since September who has basically lead me done stuff with me and still tries to act platonic while teasing me and breadcruming constantly, also still acting flirty and touchy when drunk.
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