Resume with no exp?

AuraMaxxing

AuraMaxxing

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I’m in uni rn and summer break is coming up, didn’t try looking for an internship but do want to get a job (litreally anything, I would put the fries in the bag if I have to) but I have never worked a day in my life jfl, wtf do I put on my resume? How do I jobmaxx as a complete noob?
 
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Bump
 
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Bump
 
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Bump again 🫠
 
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idk.

I volunteered at a homeless shelter when I was like 14 so I could lie on my resume and act like I had more experience.

Volunteering for at least a couple of weeks in a charity might a good move
 
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I guess lying it is, I don’t really care if I get blacklisted from Walmart anyways
 
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idk.

I volunteered at a homeless shelter when I was like 14 so I could lie on my resume and act like I had more experience.

Volunteering for at least a couple of weeks in a charity might a good move
I do have some volunteer exp as a babysitter, my mom is also willing to lie and say I worked for her, I’ll just lie some more
 
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I’m in uni rn and summer break is coming up, didn’t try looking for an internship but do want to get a job (litreally anything, I would put the fries in the bag if I have to) but I have never worked a day in my life jfl, wtf do I put on my resume? How do I jobmaxx as a complete noob?
just lie nigga. say that you worked somewhere where it's hard to prove and just make everything up. i have a thread just for that
 
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just lie nigga. say that you worked somewhere where it's hard to prove and just make everything up. i have a thread just for that
What if they ask for proof? Like acceptance letter or some shit?
 
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lie on resume:feelsgood:
 
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I’m in uni rn and summer break is coming up, didn’t try looking for an internship but do want to get a job (litreally anything, I would put the fries in the bag if I have to) but I have never worked a day in my life jfl, wtf do I put on my resume? How do I jobmaxx as a complete noob?
job applications to mcdonalds
 
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I’m in uni rn and summer break is coming up, didn’t try looking for an internship but do want to get a job (litreally anything, I would put the fries in the bag if I have to) but I have never worked a day in my life jfl, wtf do I put on my resume? How do I jobmaxx as a complete noob?
I had this problem like last year and the year before that (I go to a CC rn) and I never really got the chance to work a job in HS despite wanting to (three years taken away by COVID and my parents didnt want me to immediately wageslave flipping burgers for some reason as they thought it was "below me")

When I started applying after HS, I got rejected/filtered a lot (nonexistent resume/CV) and nothing came out of an interview I had for chick-fil-a (good cause I would've never lasted in an overly NT goyslop joint with 30 people in the same small crowded kitchen, istg the people working there are uncannily beaming with wide smiles its uncomfortable for my high inhib self) but I digress.

After researching why it was so hard to land a basic job in Cali nowadays (you need to have prior experience even if you've never actually had experience to be seen JFL) I started to get to work and made a BS waffle resume/CV that listed like some crypto discord my group ran by my friends yearrrss ago and acted like I was a CFO or smth and then also listed my website design upselling side hustle under a fake agency and made it seem like an actual sales job. After a few rejected sales/receptionist interviews that I thought went well I managed to finally land a decent part time gig selling designer eyewear/sunglasses (it's never over) still a brokie wagie job though but its chill and it improved my social interaction skills after the damage the pandemic did to me and I now have enough experience to not get filtered though hordes of applicants when I apply for a better paying job ($20-$25+).


TLDNRD: resumemaxx by adding 2-3 fake non-niche experience (Wal-Mart, supermarkets, etc) and maybe any volunteer work you did as it shows some leadership skills and that you're not a braindead nincompoop ape and if they ask to call your previous boss just make them call your friend or any other trusted (adult-sounding) male to waffle about how great you were. If they ask you why you want to work at their place now instead just say smth like you want better pay and don't pretend to badmouth past employers as that's a glaring red flag. Pretend to be interested by asking basic shi like "what can I expect from this job, responsibilities, and what's the day to day like etc. You can use reddit/AI if you need any other tips and also try to fake some past experiences or problem solving moments or prepare for the most commonly asked questions related to the role.

This is obvious but you're also gonna have to pretend to be NT in the interview at least because if you act like a betabuxxing dead bedroom Becky in the interview that energy will be matched and you won't get in. Act experienced even though you aren't because unfortunately most hiring managers don't want to experiment and let you prove yourself capable on the job. The gymnastics you have to go through for a wagie job sometimes is dehumanizing.

Fake it till you make it G, the shit we have to do for a job flipping burgers in 2025 jfl.
 
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Good Gandy that was longer than I thought it'd be, DNR plz
 
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I’m in uni rn and summer break is coming up, didn’t try looking for an internship but do want to get a job (litreally anything, I would put the fries in the bag if I have to) but I have never worked a day in my life jfl, wtf do I put on my resume? How do I jobmaxx as a complete noob?
You either leave it out entirely or you embellish some voluntary work you did in the past.
 
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I had this problem like last year and the year before that (I go to a CC rn) and I never really got the chance to work a job in HS despite wanting to (three years taken away by COVID and my parents didnt want me to immediately wageslave flipping burgers for some reason as they thought it was "below me")

When I started applying after HS, I got rejected/filtered a lot (nonexistent resume/CV) and nothing came out of an interview I had for chick-fil-a (good cause I would've never lasted in an overly NT goyslop joint with 30 people in the same small crowded kitchen, istg the people working there are uncannily beaming with wide smiles its uncomfortable for my high inhib self) but I digress.

After researching why it was so hard to land a basic job in Cali nowadays (you need to have prior experience even if you've never actually had experience to be seen JFL) I started to get to work and made a BS waffle resume/CV that listed like some crypto discord my group ran by my friends yearrrss ago and acted like I was a CFO or smth and then also listed my website design upselling side hustle under a fake agency and made it seem like an actual sales job. After a few rejected sales/receptionist interviews that I thought went well I managed to finally land a decent part time gig selling designer eyewear/sunglasses (it's never over) still a brokie wagie job though but its chill and it improved my social interaction skills after the damage the pandemic did to me and I now have enough experience to not get filtered though hordes of applicants when I apply for a better paying job ($20-$25+).


TLDNRD: resumemaxx by adding 2-3 fake non-niche experience (Wal-Mart, supermarkets, etc) and maybe any volunteer work you did as it shows some leadership skills and that you're not a braindead nincompoop ape and if they ask to call your previous boss just make them call your friend or any other trusted (adult-sounding) male to waffle about how great you were. If they ask you why you want to work at their place now instead just say smth like you want better pay and don't pretend to badmouth past employers as that's a glaring red flag. Pretend to be interested by asking basic shi like "what can I expect from this job, responsibilities, and what's the day to day like etc. You can use reddit/AI if you need any other tips and also try to fake some past experiences or problem solving moments or prepare for the most commonly asked questions related to the role.

This is obvious but you're also gonna have to pretend to be NT in the interview at least because if you act like a betabuxxing dead bedroom Becky in the interview that energy will be matched and you won't get in. Act experienced even though you aren't because unfortunately most hiring managers don't want to experiment and let you prove yourself capable on the job. The gymnastics you have to go through for a wagie job sometimes is dehumanizing.

Fake it till you make it G, the shit we have to do for a job flipping burgers in 2025 jfl.
Read all of it and this is relatable as fuck, I guess I have to liemaxx to work lol, but I’ll take your advice and others alike and report back once I land a job
 
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@Seth Walsh
 
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you don't have to lie, you can get free online internships of websites like forage and stuff. They'll even give you like a certificate or letter proving that you 'worked' there, u just have to complete a bunch of modules and then you get the certificate.
 
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you don't have to lie, you can get free online internships of websites like forage and stuff. They'll even give you like a certificate or letter proving that you 'worked' there, u just have to complete a bunch of modules and then you get the certificate.
More the merrier I guess, I’m still going to lie though think I can get away
 
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More the merrier I guess, I’m still going to lie though think I can get away
you can do both obv the more real stuff you can add the better, also you can try tacking on maybe club experience from school/uni for leadership exp if you have that. I'd also advise that you find 2-3 types of entry level jobs that meet your criteria (wage, hours, benefits) and then spam your resume on Indeed applications until you have like 60+ jobs applied to at least.

Indeed has this follow-up feature it'll show you in the messages tabs for employers just so you can remind them to look at your resume, this unironically helped me in getting my job as my boss told me if it weren't for that he wouldn't have noticed my applications amongst the sea of 50+ other applications.

Obviously I'm not trying to advocate for lying in general but a little fluff and filler on the CV is literally needed to get any basic wagie job these days. Also just try to show integrity, shake hands, and smile during the interview and try not to overthink about questions and the more short and sweet/straightforward your replies are the better. It helps to google what questions they usually ask for 'xyz position' at 'xyz store' and practice your answers with ChatGPT or whatever AI Language Model you prefer using.

I cannot guarantee you that you will land a job immediately on your first interview but after your first few you will get more comfortable and you'll be likelier to land something with that practice/experience.

Anyways I wish you the best in your job search bhai, you can do it. :feelsokman:
 
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Lie nigga
its litteraly impossible to find a job without exp
 
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you can do both obv the more real stuff you can add the better, also you can try tacking on maybe club experience from school/uni for leadership exp if you have that. I'd also advise that you find 2-3 types of entry level jobs that meet your criteria (wage, hours, benefits) and then spam your resume on Indeed applications until you have like 60+ jobs applied to at least.

Indeed has this follow-up feature it'll show you in the messages tabs for employers just so you can remind them to look at your resume, this unironically helped me in getting my job as my boss told me if it weren't for that he wouldn't have noticed my applications amongst the sea of 50+ other applications.

Obviously I'm not trying to advocate for lying in general but a little fluff and filler on the CV is literally needed to get any basic wagie job these days. Also just try to show integrity, shake hands, and smile during the interview and try not to overthink about questions and the more short and sweet/straightforward your replies are the better. It helps to google what questions they usually ask for 'xyz position' at 'xyz store' and practice your answers with ChatGPT or whatever AI Language Model you prefer using.

I cannot guarantee you that you will land a job immediately on your first interview but after your first few you will get more comfortable and you'll be likelier to land something with that practice/experience.

Anyways I wish you the best in your job search bhai, you can do it. :feelsokman:
Bet thank you very much for more advice lol, didn’t know that’s as a feature. I got some of my friends to agree to lie for me. So do I just use real companies and put their phone numbers for it or do I create fake companies if so wouldn’t they wanna verify whether the company is real or not?
 
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Never fucking mind, friends backed out of lying because they’re scared jfl “bro just apply you won’t need to lie” said the guy with family friends who landed him a job 🤣🤣🤣
 
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I’m in uni rn and summer break is coming up, didn’t try looking for an internship but do want to get a job (litreally anything, I would put the fries in the bag if I have to) but I have never worked a day in my life jfl, wtf do I put on my resume? How do I jobmaxx as a complete noob?
Age?
 

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