Deleted member 8583
ice trae
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Investment banking salaries are through the roof, with even higher bonuses. Working an IB FO (front office) job for 5-10 years will give you enough money to afford Lefort 3, 50 times over. This is the most effective route to careermaxx then surgerymaxx, and I'll be telling you how to do it.
With all good things in life, you're going to need a good base. By this I mean academics wise. You must have stellar high school grades (or A-level grades for fellow UKcels). Im talking near top of the class, so I hope you've been studymaxxing (for youngcels reading this, study as hard as u fucking can right now if ur not a PSL 6, as you're going to need this guide). You must also be attending a target university in your country (these are universities that are targeted by top investment banks and make up most of the analyst classes). For USA this includes the Ivy's, particularly Harvard and Wharton. For Europe, this includes Polytechnique, ENSAE, Mines, Dauphine, HEC, ESSEC, ESCP, SSE, RSM, HSG, Bocconi, Mannheim. For UK this includes LSE, Oxbridge, UCL, Warwick.
How to Investment Bankingmaxx?
1) Sign up to WSO (Wall Street oasis). JFL if you haven't already, you're not even trying. Download all of their templates for CV's and Cover letters, then ask the nerdcels on there to 'roast your CV'. These guys are as obsessed with CV's as the people here are with facial ratios and gonion angles. Take their analysis and advice, then adapt your CV until its psl 8 gigachad tier. Also, and I can't stress how important this is. Buy the WSO Excel Modelling course (https://il130.infusionsoft.app/app/...okieUUID=3eefcbb9-c30e-4921-9e70-0a1e5f05f9c3). Excel is arguably the most important tool in IB so an in-depth knowledge taught from an actual banker will be invaluable. You can then list this under the skills section of your CV and mention it in every cover letter.
2) Buy a Financial Times subscription and then buy 10 lever arched folders from Amazon. Dedicate each folder to a different investment bank (one for Goldman, one for Barclays, one for BAML, one for JPM etc). Collect as much information on each of these banks as you can (LGBT practices, diversity policies, deals they've conducted, podcasts they do, recent news about restructuring etc, their core values). The more you know about the banks individually, the better you can tailor your cover letter to them. Read the FT everyday and everytime you see one of these big banks' names pop up with an article, read it-> understand it-> put it into your folder.
3) Network as much as you fucking can. Sign up to all the networking events offered by these banks on their websites (even the ones designed for blacks and LGBT) and your universities careers portals (if you go to a target uni, there will certainly be events.) Go to these in person or virtual events and ask questions about recent deals they've closed or more about their roles at the bank. Then ask them if there's anyone they can refer you to speak to in order to find out more about the bank and opportunities offered. Get the people you talked to's business card. Set a google reminder for their company and division (e.g. tell google to send you notifications on M&A activity at Goldman Sachs). If you see they close a deal, send the person you talked to from the division a congratulatory email. This holds you higher in their esteems and is valuable networking. Now you can successfully name drop these people you've talked to in your cover letter (highly favourable, almost guaranteed success in the Cover letter section). Also list these events you attended in your CV.
3) Apply to spring weeks or super days. These are insight programmes you apply to in your first year of University. These are almost essential in order to secure a second year summer analyst internship, which in turn leads to a full contract offer if you perform well during the internship (more on that later). Fill your cover letter with name drops and recent events/deals the bank has been involved in. Make sure to write a different cover letter for a different bank, tailoring it to them. The more name dropping the better (e.g Dave XYZ from Morgan Stanley encouraged me to apply). Heres a super important tip for your cover letter, Lie about being gay. Very fucking important. One of the things they ask for in cover letters are 'why our bank'. This is a fool-proof technique ive found to work to answer this question. Claim you are gay -> list the banks LGBT programmes and how you adore their efforts to make life better as an LGBT employee -> say why this will be the perfect working environment for you, which attracts you to this bank in particular. The next stage of your spring week application will be Psychometric tests (often provided by Cut-e, AON or Talent-Q). Most banks make you do a Situational Judgement Test and numerical test. In the SJT, you get given multiple scenarios you might face in a bank and you're asked how you would respond, so they Can assess your personality and fit to the role. For IB roles, make sure you choose the answers that demonstrate team work and being extroverted (for introvertcels, its fucking over). Show you have integrity but don't bend over backwards to follow rules. They like you challenging the status-quo.
4) If you manage to land a spring week, take 2 modafinil tablets every morning once you start your week programme. Take in all the information and impress your line managers with your excel skills from the WSO course. Be attentive and extroverted, collaborating with other spring week analysts. Doing this will impress your manager and supervisors, which should hopefully fast track you for the summer internship. Repeat this step for the summer internship and hopefully you should get a full time job offer.
If you've followed this guide correctly, congratulations. You will be making fucking bank. Go get your lefort 3 and slay chad.
With all good things in life, you're going to need a good base. By this I mean academics wise. You must have stellar high school grades (or A-level grades for fellow UKcels). Im talking near top of the class, so I hope you've been studymaxxing (for youngcels reading this, study as hard as u fucking can right now if ur not a PSL 6, as you're going to need this guide). You must also be attending a target university in your country (these are universities that are targeted by top investment banks and make up most of the analyst classes). For USA this includes the Ivy's, particularly Harvard and Wharton. For Europe, this includes Polytechnique, ENSAE, Mines, Dauphine, HEC, ESSEC, ESCP, SSE, RSM, HSG, Bocconi, Mannheim. For UK this includes LSE, Oxbridge, UCL, Warwick.
How to Investment Bankingmaxx?
1) Sign up to WSO (Wall Street oasis). JFL if you haven't already, you're not even trying. Download all of their templates for CV's and Cover letters, then ask the nerdcels on there to 'roast your CV'. These guys are as obsessed with CV's as the people here are with facial ratios and gonion angles. Take their analysis and advice, then adapt your CV until its psl 8 gigachad tier. Also, and I can't stress how important this is. Buy the WSO Excel Modelling course (https://il130.infusionsoft.app/app/...okieUUID=3eefcbb9-c30e-4921-9e70-0a1e5f05f9c3). Excel is arguably the most important tool in IB so an in-depth knowledge taught from an actual banker will be invaluable. You can then list this under the skills section of your CV and mention it in every cover letter.
2) Buy a Financial Times subscription and then buy 10 lever arched folders from Amazon. Dedicate each folder to a different investment bank (one for Goldman, one for Barclays, one for BAML, one for JPM etc). Collect as much information on each of these banks as you can (LGBT practices, diversity policies, deals they've conducted, podcasts they do, recent news about restructuring etc, their core values). The more you know about the banks individually, the better you can tailor your cover letter to them. Read the FT everyday and everytime you see one of these big banks' names pop up with an article, read it-> understand it-> put it into your folder.
3) Network as much as you fucking can. Sign up to all the networking events offered by these banks on their websites (even the ones designed for blacks and LGBT) and your universities careers portals (if you go to a target uni, there will certainly be events.) Go to these in person or virtual events and ask questions about recent deals they've closed or more about their roles at the bank. Then ask them if there's anyone they can refer you to speak to in order to find out more about the bank and opportunities offered. Get the people you talked to's business card. Set a google reminder for their company and division (e.g. tell google to send you notifications on M&A activity at Goldman Sachs). If you see they close a deal, send the person you talked to from the division a congratulatory email. This holds you higher in their esteems and is valuable networking. Now you can successfully name drop these people you've talked to in your cover letter (highly favourable, almost guaranteed success in the Cover letter section). Also list these events you attended in your CV.
3) Apply to spring weeks or super days. These are insight programmes you apply to in your first year of University. These are almost essential in order to secure a second year summer analyst internship, which in turn leads to a full contract offer if you perform well during the internship (more on that later). Fill your cover letter with name drops and recent events/deals the bank has been involved in. Make sure to write a different cover letter for a different bank, tailoring it to them. The more name dropping the better (e.g Dave XYZ from Morgan Stanley encouraged me to apply). Heres a super important tip for your cover letter, Lie about being gay. Very fucking important. One of the things they ask for in cover letters are 'why our bank'. This is a fool-proof technique ive found to work to answer this question. Claim you are gay -> list the banks LGBT programmes and how you adore their efforts to make life better as an LGBT employee -> say why this will be the perfect working environment for you, which attracts you to this bank in particular. The next stage of your spring week application will be Psychometric tests (often provided by Cut-e, AON or Talent-Q). Most banks make you do a Situational Judgement Test and numerical test. In the SJT, you get given multiple scenarios you might face in a bank and you're asked how you would respond, so they Can assess your personality and fit to the role. For IB roles, make sure you choose the answers that demonstrate team work and being extroverted (for introvertcels, its fucking over). Show you have integrity but don't bend over backwards to follow rules. They like you challenging the status-quo.
4) If you manage to land a spring week, take 2 modafinil tablets every morning once you start your week programme. Take in all the information and impress your line managers with your excel skills from the WSO course. Be attentive and extroverted, collaborating with other spring week analysts. Doing this will impress your manager and supervisors, which should hopefully fast track you for the summer internship. Repeat this step for the summer internship and hopefully you should get a full time job offer.
If you've followed this guide correctly, congratulations. You will be making fucking bank. Go get your lefort 3 and slay chad.
