If you're out of school and don't have a solid social circle, it's pretty much over

[Mongrelcel]

I actually see your point tbh. There’s always hope to improve but if push comes to shove you’ll be the one getting kicked out of the group

I'm not saying its impossible, but you'd have to run into a group of friends that are all nice people and won't hold the fact you're a friendless loser against you which is pretty unlikely - if not outright impossible. It does against human nature, we are judgmental, we form hierarchies based on status, for you to suceed the group would have to have no hierarchy - how is that possible?

 

[Deleted member 5189]

@FastBananaCEO tell me what happened or send a link

It's not that interesting interesting what do u wanna know

 

[lutte]

It's not that interesting interesting what do u wanna know

why you beat them up

 

[tyronelite]

Ehh not entirely true.. you just gotta be creative & think outside the box. now I understand my situation is probably rare & not easily replicated but lemme explain.

I had no real social circle till I got out of HS. Never played sports (circumstance), wasn’t in any clubs (outcast). My good high school told me “if there’s anything you do in college, definitely join a club”.

Fast forward to college years. All the clubs they offered I had no interest in. So what did I do? I created one.

I had a passion for cars so what I did was I created the first ever auto college club in my city with over 1,000 members. Made a shit ton of friends (obv common interest) & networked with high status people at the same time.

The college police were cool with all of us & let us have our own big parking space whenever we have meets & events, etc. Not only that but it gave me a small status boost on campus where rent one pretty much knew who I was lol

Don’t give up boys be optimistic & be creative

 

[Mongrelcel]

Ehh not entirely true.. you just gotta be creative & think outside the box. now I understand my situation is probably rare & not easily replicated but lemme explain.

I had no real social circle till I got out of HS. Never played sports (circumstance), wasn’t in any clubs (outcast). My good high school told me “if there’s anything you do in college, definitely join a club”.

Fast forward to college years. All the clubs they offered I had no interest in. So what did I do? I created one.

I had a passion for cars so what I did was I created the first ever auto college club in my city with over 1,000 members. Made a shit ton of friends (obv common interest) & networked with high status people at the same time.

The college police were cool with all of us & let us have our own big parking space whenever we have meets & events, etc. Not only that but it gave me a small status boost on campus where rent one pretty much knew who I was lol

Don’t give up boys be optimistic & be creative

Yeah, I don't think that a method like this or any other method similar to this will work for 90% of reading this thread just because we don't have the necessary social skills to make it happen. Can you imagine a socially awkward virgin (with 0 other friends) starting his own club? JFL

Noone even wants to speak to me, hear what I have to say & at this point I don't even have anything worthwhile to say anyway.

Also the title of this thread is "if you're out of school...", because there are way to make friends in UNI, but what about the people that didn't manage to make even a single social connection during the entire time?

 

[Deleted member 5189]

why you beat them up

Already said

 

[Deleted member 5189]

Ehh not entirely true.. you just gotta be creative & think outside the box. now I understand my situation is probably rare & not easily replicated but lemme explain.

I had no real social circle till I got out of HS. Never played sports (circumstance), wasn’t in any clubs (outcast). My good high school told me “if there’s anything you do in college, definitely join a club”.

Fast forward to college years. All the clubs they offered I had no interest in. So what did I do? I created one.

I had a passion for cars so what I did was I created the first ever auto college club in my city with over 1,000 members. Made a shit ton of friends (obv common interest) & networked with high status people at the same time.

The college police were cool with all of us & let us have our own big parking space whenever we have meets & events, etc. Not only that but it gave me a small status boost on campus where rent one pretty much knew who I was lol

Don’t give up boys be optimistic & be creative

We're talking about real life not GTA V online

 

[lutte]

Already said

where give a link

 

[Deleted member 5189]

where give a link

Scroll up in this thread you lazy cunt

 

[shrek]

I'm not saying its impossible, but you'd have to run into a group of friends that are all nice people and won't hold the fact you're a friendless loser against you which is pretty unlikely - if not outright impossible. It does against human nature, we are judgmental, we form hierarchies based on status, for you to suceed the group would have to have no hierarchy - how is that possible?

I have friends but they’re not super NT in the sense that we don’t party or get pussy. So it would still not be optimal. I’m in decent shape so that’s the only thing going for me

 

[tyronelite]

We're talking about real life not GTA V online

That’s your reality. You perceive it as GTA V online I don’t

 

[Deleted member 9568]

this thread was rlly good i always say to myself that most users here are normie looking to above avg with failed social life(friends, social circles).

 

[Deleted member 8576]

dnr but legit

 

[Mongrelcel]

this thread was rlly good i always say to myself that most users here are normie looking to above avg with failed social life(friends, social circles).

Truth behind incels: Incels are just unlucky

No, there's no unifying theory that explains why every single incel is an incel. There are incels that are above average looking, there are incles that are subhuman looking but most hangs around 3.5 psl. Most normie men actually doese't "deserve" to get laid, they have no game, look like shit...

looksmax.org

 

[Ritalincell]

Ok so let's all just Ldar and cry? The thread definitely has it's truths but the message is stupid

 

[Mongrelcel]

Ok so let's all just Ldar and cry? The thread definitely has it's truths but the message is stupid

The message of this thread was to explain the situation to all the redpill and bluepill copers.
How "just going outside" does not work. How our reality is different from theirs.

 

[Deleted member 9568]

i always keep coming back and lurking to this thread since i'm in a such a weird area and don't have a social circle(got like 1 friend that i can do shit with but he is also slightly outcast . I'm planning on getting an associates degree in cc college and i'm rlly worried that i won't find a good social circle that likes to party and go out. Now since corona has gone down and the bars have opened up i literally have no one to go out with, not even the fkn beach. I don't care how much money i make or much i ascend with surgeries and looks but i can't have it like this or else i*m blowing my brain off.

 

[whiteissuperior]

Think about it - even after you had improved your looks, got jacked, or whatever the fuck you wanted to do, you will still be in the exact same postion as you are now.

You simply don't have a way of making friends - that migh be because your social skills are poor, but what's more likely is that you dont even have an opportunity. There's no place for you to make friends.

The most important thing you need to have in order to form a new relationship (romantic or platonic) is TIME. You simply need to spend enough time together to become familliar.

Ever wonder why in HS even the most unprobable relationships happen? How the below average guy ends up dating the hottest girl? How the nerd befriends the football team captain?
Its because they are forced to spend time together for YEARS. Its no wonder relationships happen. They are forced to really get to know each other - not just surface level bullshit.

Why is it, that as you get older, every relationship you have is pretty much just an acquaintance? It's becasue as you get older, your life get busier, so if you want to interact with a person you need to MAKE TIME for them. And that simply is nothing like HS where wasting hours on trivial bullshit is not an issue, where the environment is set up in such a way that there is 0 pressure on you - after all youre spending the next day with them, next week, next month...

In adult world, when you make time to see someone, there's immense pressure for that social interaction to be 'good' or 'enjoyable'.
But it takes a rare level of social skills and extroversion to be able to enjoy a social interaction with a person that's not familliar to you.

Let's look at the most common places people make actual lifelong friends:
Highschool
Sport
Religious groups
Extracurricular activities

What do they all have in common?
1) you join when you're young, and stay there for years
2) there is an underlying activity you do together

Now, is there a place like this but for adults? Not really in my opinion.
You have the gym - but for some reason its an unwritten rule to not talk to strangers in the gym. Especially women.
Workplace? Probably not going to be your age group, the amount of people you meet is low but nevertheless, this will be the place where you make most of your social connections
Army? Could work, but it's not for everyone, fucks up your entire lifestyle and you wont meet any women anyway.

So you dont have a place or an opportunity to meet anybody, but thats not all - there's the fact that almost everybody already has a solid friendgroup that they have had since middleschool or HS or basically since they were young. You will never reach that status with anyone. Even if you did find a compatible person, and did have the opportunity to spend enough time together, you still will be just an acquaintance to him. Why? Because he doesent exactly need a "best friend" he already has one - multiple actually. A whole group.

One more thing - lest say there is an opportunity, lets say there is a compatible person (that's looking for a friend), theres another problem - what you want to do is very likely different from they want to do. Think about it, they have spend theur entire teenage years partying, chasing girls, hanging out and doing random bullshit - so the exact thing you want to do. But they have already lived that life, how are you going to convince a 25 yo to pack his bag and go on a roadtrip with no plan and no cash to make memories? You wont. They have already done it, they are past that life chapter.

So by now there's a fucking lot thats holding you back - weak social skills from loner teenage years, no opportunity to improve them or to even meet people, huge disconnect in values (because you are essentially a mentally stunted 15 yo) and them already having friends with years of history.


This is the biggest problem 90% of users on this site have. Not looks, looks can only speed the process up, but there is no replacement for the process of creating a bond.

All my college friends just graduated and I’m a year behind cuz I took a gap year and I’m afraid for this reason.

but as an adult there are clubs and shit you can join you just gotta be very intentional about it. Most ppls new adult friends are from work.

 

[Deleted member 9568]

Damn bro, i missed this thread but this is exactly my situation as well, i regret going to a trade school instead of a normal highschool tbh, i cucked myself cause in the trade school 80% were boring girls and about 20% guys who already had social circles from middle school....

interesting our trade school(i went to the social science hs school) seemed very good socially compared to everyone else and they had their own slut that they passed around i heard. Avg normie guy did much better and had more fun than any other hs"department"

 

[Mongrelcel]

interesting our trade school(i went to the social science hs school) seemed very good socially compared to everyone else and they had their own slut that they passed around i heard. Avg normie guy did much better and had more fun than any other hs"department"

I think thats just coincidental. All the trade schools I know are nearly all male. Cant do well in that kind of an environment.

 

[Deleted member 9568]

I think thats just coincidental. All the trade schools I know are nearly all male. Cant do well in that kind of an environment.

i live in a more blue collar town so it's not unusual that our slayers are often in a trades. Prob different perception if i was in a big city.

 

[Mongrelcel]

i live in a more blue collar town so it's not unusual that our slayers are often in a trades. Prob different perception if i was in a big city.

I didn't say that there are no slayers in trades. There are even plenty of people who have normal social lives.

But if you're a below average male, with not an already pre-established social circle, trade school can fuck you like nothing else.

 

[Deleted member 9568]

I didn't say that there are no slayers in trades. There are even plenty of people who have normal social lives.

But if you're a below average male, with not an already pre-established social circle, trade school can fuck you like nothing else.

feel like those in trades if anything are more tight than any other. I knew all of them did drugs together and had the best parties and so on even the subhumans.

 

[Deleted member 13094]

good post but tldr tbh

 

[RichardSpencel]

thing of being an outcast only works if you're a truly dark triad psychopath, if you're a normal person without friends or gf you will lose your mind.

 

[Mongrelcel]

feel like those in trades if anything are more tight than any other. I knew all of them did drugs together and had the best parties and so on even the subhumans.

you probably haven't heard about those that were excluded tbh

 

[Deleted member 15305]

its fucking over for me

 

[banjojones]

Maybe try meetup.com

This site is legit. You can find interest groups to meet uo with. For instance, if you're studying Japanese you can find a group that revolves around Japanese learning that meets up every week. You can find groups based on gardening, animals, anime, or anything you can think of. If you live near any good sized city you can find a group for any topic.

(sorry to necrobump I will add relevant info and contribute to this thread. So mods plz don't ban me lol)

I heard meetup is filled with old people. I don't have a grandma fetish sorry. I mean I COULD understand that you might find mates in maybe larger cities like LA or NYC with slightly more young people but other than that I heard its a sausage and a prune fest. I also heard most normies won't go to meetup.com because there is an unspoken rule that it is for losers. (no disrespect but we gotta LEVEL with ourselves here We MESSED UP our social lives. Sure it may not entirely be our fault but we gotta have enough self awareness to see how normies see us).

*Just curious what city do you live at?
*what is the age demographic?
*what is the club/activity?
*have you ever met a girl or got into an LTR on meetup.com?

 

[Deleted member 12002]

(sorry to necrobump I will add relevant info and contribute to this thread. So mods plz don't ban me lol)

I heard meetup is filled with old people. I don't have a grandma fetish sorry. I mean I COULD understand that you might find mates in maybe larger cities like LA or NYC with slightly more young people but other than that I heard its a sausage and a prune fest. I also heard most normies won't go to meetup.com because there is an unspoken rule that it is for losers. (no disrespect but we gotta LEVEL with ourselves here We MESSED UP our social lives. Sure it may not entirely be our fault but we gotta have enough self awareness to see how normies see us).

*Just curious what city do you live at?
*what is the age demographic?
*what is the club/activity?
*have you ever met a girl or got into an LTR on meetup.com?

I currently live close to Detroit. Though I've lived in 15 different cities over the past 10 years. This time last year I was living in a city with a population of 9.2 million. I've never used meetup, though I imagine if you tweak the search results you can find groups with much younger people.

The key isn't seeking approval/acceptance from normies. Normies will never like people like us. If you ever find yourself in a relationship with a normie you'll be stuck living as a pretender. That's no way to live.

 

[banjojones]

I currently live close to Detroit. Though I've lived in 15 different cities over the past 10 years. This time last year I was living in a city with a population of 9.2 million. I've never used meetup, though I imagine if you tweak the search results you can find groups with much younger people.

The key isn't seeking approval/acceptance from normies. Normies will never like people like us. If you ever find yourself in a relationship with a normie you'll be stuck living as a pretender. That's no way to live.

smh typical normie advice "just use meetup with a bunch of old prunes bro"
incel asks: "have you ever used it?"
normie says: "naw brah I just heard it works well in a youtube comment"

 

[Deleted member 12002]

smh typical normie advice "just use meetup with a bunch of old prunes bro"
incel asks: "have you ever used it?"
normie says: "naw brah I just heard it works well in a youtube comment"

I'm the least person akin to a normie you'd ever find. Ever since I can remember this world, and it's convention, has always hated me. There came a point though a long time ago when I stopped trying to please them. I stopped trying to be like them. I became a nail that sticks out refusing to be hammered down. Then I began to openly impose on all those who make no effort hide their contempt for me. This is when I started getting everything I wanted from life.

I'm 34 years old. I advise using meetup because it's what I would do in this day and age if I were young and unable to find a mate. It might not lead you to an ltr, but it might open other doors that one day will.

 

[Deleted member 12002]

@banjojones, this site won't ban you for necro posting. It's not uptight like inkwells .is

 

[banjojones]

I'm the least person akin to a normie you'd ever find. Ever since I can remember this world, and it's convention, has always hated me. There came a point though a long time ago when I stopped trying to please them. I stopped trying to be like them. I became a nail that sticks out refusing to be hammered down. Then I began to openly impose on all those who make no effort hide their contempt for me. This is when I started getting everything I wanted from life.

I'm 34 years old. I advise using meetup because it's what I would do in this day and age if I were young and unable to find a mate. It might not lead you to an ltr, but it might open other doors that one day will.

why do you recommend something you never tried? (btw meetup is filled with old prunes it does not work)

 

[Deleted member 12002]

why do you recommend something you never tried? (btw meetup is filled with old prunes it does not work)

I'd be trying a lot of different things. Not just meet up. The last place I'd be looking for a mate though would be tinder or plenty of fish.

The point is to move about. Get out and move. Maybe meet an old dude on meetup who eventually intruduces you to his hot granddaughter. The world's full of possibilities.

 

[banjojones]

I'd be trying a lot of different things. Not just meet up. The last place I'd be looking for a mate though would be tinder or plenty of fish.

The point is to move about. Get out and move. Maybe meet an old dude on meetup who eventually intruduces you to his hot granddaughter. The world's full of possibilities.

dude no one is having kids america's birth rate is in the shitter! (most old fucks have no grandkids) have you ACTUALLY met a woman at a hobby club? (IDK anything is possible but I don't know ANYONE IRL who did)

 

[BeenLMSsinceMSN]

I'd be trying a lot of different things. Not just meet up. The last place I'd be looking for a mate though would be tinder or plenty of fish.

The point is to move about. Get out and move. Maybe meet an old dude on meetup who eventually intruduces you to his hot granddaughter. The world's full of possibilities.

Did moving around help you meet people?

 

[Deleted member 12002]

Did moving around help you meet people?

Yes. Loads. Traveling is actually the best way to meet people. You always meet other travelers who are in the same boat as you.

 

[Deleted member 12002]

dude no one is having kids america's birth rate is in the shitter! (most old fucks have no grandkids) have you ACTUALLY met a woman at a hobby club? (IDK anything is possible but I don't know ANYONE IRL who did)

It's just an example. I'm sure tons of decent looking girls go to anime meetups and whatnot. It's so mainstream now days.

Look, if you live in a small town that's probably not gonna work. You'll have to find something else. Probably try to leave where you're at. Big cities have lots of hobby clubs where girls will be. Even small cities probably.

Tons of people have kids. Old people especially. I got me a big baby myself, and fixin to have about 10 more if God's willing.

 

[stamaster21]

Damn bro, i missed this thread but this is exactly my situation as well, i regret going to a trade school instead of a normal highschool tbh, i cucked myself cause in the trade school 80% were boring girls and about 20% guys who already had social circles from middle school....

I understand this 100 percent, when i was in highschool, their was a program called ctc, were they send juniors and seniors to electronics/electrical training program, they had coooking, hvac and cable installer program. And after a year you got diploma. It was awful it was like 80 percent guys, and most of these guys already had their social circles from middle school and elementary school. I asked after 3 months to be switched back to the normal highschool program. basically the ctc program would pick students from the the main highschool, and drive them 40 minutes to the ctc campus.

When i went back to the normal highschool i was so much more happy, better socializing, got invited to things, thou i didnt take the options given at the time. Years later i went to trade school for electrical, after transfering from a college studying electronics tech.

 

[Lux]

Why staying & networking as long as possible in uni for a high-paying job is ideal even with student loans. It's everything, probably where you meet your longer-term partner & make long lasting friends. Just get good grades & you're set.

Be good at some sports, join a local sports club as well, & find some guys your age group. Where most of my uncles in their 30s get their entire social network besides work.

 

[traveler]

yeah pretty much

 

[banjojones]

It's just an example. I'm sure tons of decent looking girls go to anime meetups and whatnot. It's so mainstream now days.

Look, if you live in a small town that's probably not gonna work. You'll have to find something else. Probably try to leave where you're at. Big cities have lots of hobby clubs where girls will be. Even small cities probably.

Tons of people have kids. Old people especially. I got me a big baby myself, and fixin to have about 10 more if God's willing.

you married with kids?

 

[DivineBeing]

Think about it - even after you had improved your looks, got jacked, or whatever the fuck you wanted to do, you will still be in the exact same postion as you are now.

You simply don't have a way of making friends - that migh be because your social skills are poor, but what's more likely is that you dont even have an opportunity. There's no place for you to make friends.

The most important thing you need to have in order to form a new relationship (romantic or platonic) is TIME. You simply need to spend enough time together to become familliar.

Ever wonder why in HS even the most unprobable relationships happen? How the below average guy ends up dating the hottest girl? How the nerd befriends the football team captain?
Its because they are forced to spend time together for YEARS. Its no wonder relationships happen. They are forced to really get to know each other - not just surface level bullshit.

Why is it, that as you get older, every relationship you have is pretty much just an acquaintance? It's becasue as you get older, your life get busier, so if you want to interact with a person you need to MAKE TIME for them. And that simply is nothing like HS where wasting hours on trivial bullshit is not an issue, where the environment is set up in such a way that there is 0 pressure on you - after all youre spending the next day with them, next week, next month...

In adult world, when you make time to see someone, there's immense pressure for that social interaction to be 'good' or 'enjoyable'.
But it takes a rare level of social skills and extroversion to be able to enjoy a social interaction with a person that's not familliar to you.

Let's look at the most common places people make actual lifelong friends:
Highschool
Sport
Religious groups
Extracurricular activities

What do they all have in common?
1) you join when you're young, and stay there for years
2) there is an underlying activity you do together

Now, is there a place like this but for adults? Not really in my opinion.
You have the gym - but for some reason its an unwritten rule to not talk to strangers in the gym. Especially women.
Workplace? Probably not going to be your age group, the amount of people you meet is low but nevertheless, this will be the place where you make most of your social connections
Army? Could work, but it's not for everyone, fucks up your entire lifestyle and you wont meet any women anyway.

So you dont have a place or an opportunity to meet anybody, but thats not all - there's the fact that almost everybody already has a solid friendgroup that they have had since middleschool or HS or basically since they were young. You will never reach that status with anyone. Even if you did find a compatible person, and did have the opportunity to spend enough time together, you still will be just an acquaintance to him. Why? Because he doesent exactly need a "best friend" he already has one - multiple actually. A whole group.

One more thing - lest say there is an opportunity, lets say there is a compatible person (that's looking for a friend), theres another problem - what you want to do is very likely different from they want to do. Think about it, they have spend theur entire teenage years partying, chasing girls, hanging out and doing random bullshit - so the exact thing you want to do. But they have already lived that life, how are you going to convince a 25 yo to pack his bag and go on a roadtrip with no plan and no cash to make memories? You wont. They have already done it, they are past that life chapter.

So by now there's a fucking lot thats holding you back - weak social skills from loner teenage years, no opportunity to improve them or to even meet people, huge disconnect in values (because you are essentially a mentally stunted 15 yo) and them already having friends with years of history.


This is the biggest problem 90% of users on this site have. Not looks, looks can only speed the process up, but there is no replacement for the process of creating a bond.

schizo doomer

if youre gl g oon insta or tinder

0 brain subhuman kike

 

[DoctorLooksmax]

I have plenty of friends but almost all are male - I’ve only once or twice had success with girls trough social Circe, OLD and cold approaches have yielded better results for me

 

[BeenLMSsinceMSN]

Yes. Loads. Traveling is actually the best way to meet people. You always meet other travelers who are in the same boat as you.

What places did you travel to? And how did you meet other travelers?

 

[Deleted member 12002]

you married with kids?

Yeah, married three years and got a 4 month old boy.

 

[Deleted member 12002]

What places did you travel to? And how did you meet other travelers?

All over China, Vietnam, and Cambodia. More like expats. I met with other expats. Go to any foregn country and they're will be an expat "bubble" to be found.

 

[banjojones]

Yeah, married three years and got a 4 month old boy.

How did you meet your wife? Is the boy biologically yours or your step/adopted child?

 

[Deleted member 12002]

How did you meet your wife? Is the boy biologically yours or your step/adopted child?

At work. She was my manager, but I was always the boss lol. Yeah, the boy's mine. I would never mess with no single mothers.

 

[Deleted member 16134]

friends don't pay my bills what good are they